HUNAN SPICE

Look who's turning Five!

2012-01-21T07:33:00.000-08:00

"All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them."

Author: Walt Disney

To my Dear Kira,

I still remember clearly, the day I first set eyes on you. A crying tiny, babe, bundled up in yellow and blue. Your cries were soft as you looked at me; frightened and confused just like any baby.

But you weren’t just any other baby, you were my daughter, the child I had dreamed about, longed every night for.

I held you close to comfort you, but your sobs lingered a day or two. I knew the love that was here awaiting you, but it would take time for you to trust and know me, just like I too. We were a pair, the two of us, a mother and daughter who found one another at last.

Words can’t explain just how much I adore and love you, I can only show you my heart is in my hand, always there to reach out to you.

Now four years later, my love for you is stronger and we understand each other as mother and daughter. I love your hugs and kisses and combing your soft brown hair. I love when you snuggle up and ask to be held so tightly, even if you do this every single nightly!

Oh dear Kira, you’ve become quite the young lady, so sweet, kind and gentle, your personality entertains me daily.

Now that you’re going to be five, I look back at the past few years and just sigh.

They have gone so quickly while I was trying to discover this role of Motherhood; but it’s okay, I got it down now for there's now two in our brood!

My little yummy (aka for Kira), I just want to say, I wish you a very healthy and happy Birthday.

Love forever,

Your Mommy

The pursuit of truth and beauty is a sphere of activity in which we are permitted to remain children all our lives.

Albert Einstein

Photo time with Mommy

2011-12-28T09:38:00.000-08:00

I always loved photographing children, but now having my own daughters, a lifetime dream, seems to bring new meaning to my passion. In fact I have forced myself to not edit, but instead capture their innocent and pure beauty!

Of course Shelby seems to like the camera and has developed her own little poses for the camera. There's the head tilt, the "i have no idea what you are saying look" and "i'll do what my sister is doing" pose!

And for those that know Kira, she's sooooooo dislikes having her pic taken, I have to plead with her, which doesn't help the situation any:)) Then she too has recently developed her own photographic style which is very unique to her personality.

Kira has perfected "the princess pout and pose", the "cheeky smile so Mommy will let me chew gum"pose and the "I'm actually having fun" candid pose. The later is my personal favorite of course. These days I'll take anything from the girls since they are growing like weeds and I want to capture every precious moment.

Everyday I look at these beautiful faces and say to myself "I can't believe they are my daughters"! When I see the joy in their eyes, I feel the excitement and joy of being their Momma. I am so happy and thrilled that they are slowly beginning to acknowledge one another as sisters. Kira calls her "sweetie" when she hurts and has offered up her favorite dolls. And Shelby just continues to look up to Kira and follow her moves, even Kira's spicy "foot stomping" lol. It's all good and all fun to observe!

My daughters sure know how to raise parents!!!

You girls are so loved.

Happy Holidays

2011-12-25T09:41:00.000-08:00

Fall Follies and more!

2011-11-25T16:47:00.000-08:00

It's hard to believe that it has been a month since the first time we held little Shelby! She continues to blossom as she explores her new world here, EVEN gaining 2 pounds, which has me tickled. Shelby can eat like there's no end to her food pipeline. I was laughing tonight as we finally ordered in some Chinese food since we got back from China and it's too bad I didn't take before and after photos, because the babe ate almost a pint of pork lomein, along with 2 yogurts! Did I mention, the girl can eat??? I am normally not so food conscious since I finally realized after 4 yrs that kids will eat when they're hungry, but it's so important that we get some weight on her before her surgery. In addition to her 3 meals/day I supplement with vanilla PediaSure shakes, cheese, whole grain bread and vanilla almond milk (yummy). Even Kira seems to enjoy eating more these days.

Along with her fondness for food, she is also making great strides in communicating and her very first clear word, was the name of her Jie Jie, Kira! I thought Kira would be amused but she seemed indifferent. It wasn't until a few days ago when she started to look at pictures of Ariel and say "Ariel" when Kira sort of looked at her as if to say "hey that's my favorite Princess". I explained before the yelling competition ensued that because Kira is constantly talking and drawing pics of Ariel, naturally little sis is following in her footsteps. Guess I'm going to have to find her a fav. Princess of her own really quick:))

The girls delight and amuse me most of the day, but the transistion for Kira has been very difficult, even to the point where I just loose it and start to cry, holding her tightly and re-assuring her that I love with all my heart. I am not sure what sets her off but she gets so defiant and acts out in ways I never thought she was capable of. People tell me it's normal and this will eventually fade (not really, or perhaps when their 21, married with kids of their own), but it's so hard to see my baby girl get so upset. For now we're giving her some extra TLC with little surprises here and there. Honestly, the surprises don't effect her, but the extra hugs and kisses = magic! And that's so easy to do.

Well, with little time to blog, email, talk, relax and so on, I still love to capture the beauty of my daughters (love saying that) through photography. Shelby is a real little actress as you will see, and Kira, well she'd rather not be photographed, unless she's hanging in a tree.

Oh these big brown eyes!

My Hunan Princess! How I adore you Kira.

Guangzhou and the US Consulate

2011-11-08T07:23:00.000-08:00

Finally we are on our way to Guangzhou, China. This is the last leg of the adoption process and where we met up with many other adoptive families from all over the country and even the world.
It's very tropical and pretty here, but oh I am thrilled that we are in a Hotel with air conditioning and a nearby Starbucks so Momma here can get her java fix.

We were reunited with our friends, The Gibsons and Kira's new family of friends. It was wonderful to see so many smiles from many other adoptive families, holding their new child or children.

Since some recent changes regarding China's adoption policies, qualifying families were now allowed to adopt two children at the same time. So it was indeed exciting to see just how many adoptive parents were taking advantage of this opportunity.

Thus far Shelby has done nicely and appeared to bond the closest with Kira and myself. There were no more sobs at night, however, occasionally she would just push me away and try to turn on her side and go to sleep. I didn't know if that was her routine or some serious grieving, but realized it was the grieving for her foster family and so I would gently rock her to sleep. I also realized this babe couldn't really turn on her side without some help because of her wide pelvic deformity, so once I realized this, she seemed to appreciate that Momma was there to make her comfortable too:)) Overall Shelby seemed to accept us but again I was preparing myself for another big transition when we got home.

Sweet Sisters!

Oh so happy to see Kira smiling again with her pals. A wonderful family of seven who Kira connected to immediately.

Spencer and Jesse

Kaaren's newest Mei Mei Ellie, isnt' she cute!

My Pouting Princess before playing with the Theobald children.

Happy Girl with The Theobald kiddies!

"Oh do I have to take another photo???"

The Gibson Girls!

Precious Belle and Scarlett (little Scarlett was adopted from Hunan with Kira)

Belle and her new brother Chan. What a handsome boy!

Of course she's happy because we found out that breakfast is her favorite meal of the day. Kira even gave her an Ariel doll for the trip!

So thankfully Shelby passed her medical exam and took the oath at the US Consulate in Guangzhou (November 8, 2011) making her a brand new US Citizen! I was going to photograph the events but just wanted to get out of there and onto the streets of the pretty Island. Our time was so limited this journey that I was shooting pics from inside the taxi to and from our hotel. All went well and we finally got Shelby's passport and US Visa into the states!

We are so ready to come home!

But first some pics from Guangzhou.

Words can really not express the emotions we have as we now begin our journey home. We have nurtured some incredible friendships during the adoption process and hope that we can stay in contact with the new families we met as well. China will always hold a special place in our hearts for allowing us to become the parents of two beautiful girls. Our Journey to Shelby was filled with surprises and many ups and downs but no matter how frustrated we became or alone we felt, we were really part of one large family, the "Holt Family" and their exemplary staff who worked so hard to get their job done and also make us feel comfortable and right at home here in China.

We are so grateful and blessed to have our children, but as we said our farewells I couldn't help but think of all the children that still needed the love of families. I hope that some how this blog can be of some inspiration to any parent considering international adoption.

Thanks for following our journey. More photos and updates coming soon!

Taking Baby Steps, Langzhou continued

2011-11-02T06:01:00.000-07:00

By the third day, Shelby was smiling, playing with Kira and in Mandarin, asking to be picked up by me! Oh how good that felt. Most importantly she seemed happy, started to cackle at our antics to make her laugh, and then it just clicked for all of us! She played peek a boo, would imitate Kira's every move (which I think started to annoy little Kira) and started talking (again in Mandarin) very consistently and appropriately, according to Kaige. We were told that she speaks excellent Mandarin and can say, pick me up, down, hungry, thirsty, no, yes. We also found out that she is a big flirt and winks at adults (both men and female). Where ever we went with both girls, especially to restaurants, we were surrounded by waitresses wanting to engage both girls in play or conversation. It was so enjoyable to watch, but I must admit it got tiring when all we wanted to do was have a decent meal at the end of a busy day!

The time we spent in Langzhou was very busy, with Kaige doing the best she could trying to get the baby's passport ready in time for our trip to the US Consulate in Guangzhou. One day we spent shopping to gather some necessities we didn't bring with us. We were concerned about Shelby's low weight so since we were told she is still on formula, well, we bought formula, bottles and even more pacifiers. What we were surprised to find is that this child drinks straight out of a water bottle, totally dislikes formula and will only eat normal food! Yay for that. Instead, baby bottles were used to irrigate her bladder and cups for bathing. We donated the formula to the orphanage, along with any other supplies we didn't need.

There's about 3 eggs, pancakes and waffles on her plate and she two fisted it all in:))

That day we headed out with Kaige to another part of the Lanzhou. I found the architecture so beautiful and in stark contrast to the old buildings that seem to dwarf these modern high rises.

Oh how I loved all the bronze sculptures in this garden!

Pretty Shelby, still a bit hesitant about what was happening and missing her foster family.

That night for the first time in three days, she sobbed herself quietly to sleep. I would try to stroke her face or rub her back and she would push me away and turn her head away. It was so awful to see this child of ours grieving so for the only family she knew. We were confident with some time, she would come around and there would be more smiles on that pretty face!

Kaige was a huge help with Kira. She often would just take her hand and make her feel comfortable when it seemed all attention was on Shelby. Oh and Ariel had a big part too:))

Going To Gansu

2011-10-31T03:39:00.000-07:00

Today is the day! We meet Shelby upon arrival to our hotel in Lanzhou, Gansu. We packed (again) the evening before, went to breakfast, and hit the road early to make sure we arrived at the airport in time.
That morning there was dense fog all over the city and it appeared once we got to the airport that our flight was still on time. So we made ourselves a bit too comfortable when they announced that our flight would indeed be delayed due to fog. Okay so what's an hour or two! I kept telling myself that just because the fog seemed to hug the ground and wasn't dissipating. So we waited and waited until about 4 1/2 hours later they boarded the plane. I must say the airline was very accommodating and gave out food to all the passengers with bottled water. Actually I didn't mind the wait, since I was now running on empty myself and felt like I needed a nap, but who could sleep! I kept thinking about my little girl, will she run away, push me, smile. Did she eat? Was she changed? Who was with her and did they know how to take care of her defect? I knew we were not allowed to meet the foster family so the baby was coming to meet us at our hotel with some orphanage directors. I was sure they would take good care, but again after traveling half way around the world, this minor delay started me on a roller coaster of emotions. We also had no way of contacting anyone in Lanzhou, however I believe the travel agency did let them know about our delay.

Well finally we boarded and flew the 3 hour flight to Lanzhou. We were met by a wonderful escort Kaige, in fact she had been with Holt a long time and ran the foster care program in Wu Wei County. I could tell we would be in good hands with her kind, soft voice and reassuring answers to my many questions.

So here we go! Off to the hotel to meet our baby girl. This is the part where I have no photos of our first meeting because we took video this time around. We entered the doors to the hotel and were met by a 32 inch smiling little girl, all dressed in pink! She took one look at us and ran back to the officials sitting on the couches. I smiled and we all sort of relieved to see her move so fast!

Everyone was exhausted, mainly the baby. The ride from her Provincial city to Lanzhou was almost 6 hours so I could tell everyone wanted to sign the paperwork and get to bed.

This was the most difficult part of our journey. The "hand off" literally took place in our hotel room, where the baby was handed to me, screaming for her "momma" or foster mother the entire time. It was very hot in the room and Shelby was soaking wet from perspiration. I proceeded to change her, thinking I was prepared to do it alone, but needed a second hand. Dani was busy with officials and paperwork and then I started to sob myself. I looked down at this tiny, thin toddler, with her bladder exposed outside her tummy and every time I touched her she yelled "ouch" and grabbed her ears. She kept on screaming and yelling for her foster mother and all I kept thinking was, just get the medicated dressings on her and wrap her up. The officials left the room and Kaige stayed to help calm her, but Shelby continued to sob, all the while, pushing me away and refusing to make eye contact. This was absolutely heart wrenching to see a small child so upset, in pain and confused. I knew the transition would be hard, but until you actually experience it, you have no idea how hard it was going to be. Even Dani looked down, trying to console our new daughter, but she also pushed him away. Both of us were almost in tears after three hours of sobbing. Then eventually she cried herself to sleep.

Then I looked around the room and found Kira in the corner also sobbing to herself. So I lost it again, bent down to pick her up and just held ever so tight. Kira had no idea what was happening and when I asked her why she was crying, she wanted to know why she was crying for her "momma". I guess she may have thought we were taking her away from her real biological parents and from a toddlers point of view that's so real. I reassured her that she was crying for the lady who cared for her till we came. I also told her that all older women are called "Momma" in China. She seemed to understand and then we all climbed into bed and fell asleep, completely exhausted!

The next morning we met Kaige and went to the Civil Affairs Office where the official notarization of the many copies of adoption paperwork were completed. Both Kira and Shelby seemed indifferent about the entire thing, but at least Shelby managed to calm down. That second day was a flurry of activity so Shelby really didn't seem to mind being with us. We hoped she was turning the corner here but again, realized she would continue to grieve for her foster family as long as it took. It's hard to watch, but even harder knowing you simply have to give her time and even some space.

On October 31, 2011, Miss Shelby Emmalin officially became our daughter!

And so we headed back to our Hotel, very happy that another orphan of China had found her way to her Forever Family!

We so love you Shelby and know that time will heal your little heart!

Even in this photo you can see the big difference a day makes:))

Bejing Day 2

2011-10-29T14:55:00.000-07:00

Today was a particularly moving day as we had made arrangements to meet up in Bejing with the young woman who was our escort for Kira's adoption in 2008. Her name is Leah and she will always hold a special place in my heart for all the things she did for us during our journey to Kira. I sort of tell people that during the adoption, your escort is analogous to a "midwife" helping you through the ups and downs of the transitional phase after the hand off. Leah and I managed to email occasionally and when we told her we were coming back to China, well, we knew we would have to meet up again!

We went to lunch at a favorite local restaurant and then took the subway to the Bejing Zoo.

While at the Zoo, I told Leah I'd love to get some photos of her (guess I knew a photo op when I saw it). She agreed and well as you can see she's beautiful and I was able to process this within minutes upon arriving to our hotel.

We had a wonderful time meeting again. Just as I did 4 years ago when we parted at the airport, I got all teary eyed and then spent the rest of the trip looking for eligible bachlers for her lol. Guess that's the Mom in me!

We love you Leah!!!

Destination Bejing

2011-10-28T20:10:00.000-07:00

I had full intentions of blogging from China only to find out I had no access to google blogger. It was some what of a blessing in a way to not be on the computer as this journey was mentally and physically exhausting for us all. Since I decided to carry my camera, I thought I would let the photographs speak for themselves.

After a 13 hour flight from JFK and 6380 miles away from NJ, we arrived safely in Bejing. It was so exciting to be back there and I felt the anticipation starting to gain momentum. Although exhausted, we all couldn't really sleep and just took a quick nap and then went down to the breakfast buffet (the best meal of the day). Our Hotel was downtown this time so you could feel the hustle and bustle of this huge city. The only thing that really annoyed me was the constant beeping of car horns and for those of you who have been to any big city in China, you know what I mean. I find it funny in some ways that that sound was also once a way of how Americans drove here in the states, especially on the highways and byways along the east coast. I also found it somewhat interesting that when you were in a car, taxi or bus going anywhere in Bejing, if you opened the window, you could literally touch the vehicle next to you. As Dani kept saying "these drivers go from 8 lanes to 2 and don't even seem to look". That's probably why we stayed close to the sidewalks and avoided crossing the streets!

First object of the day, food!

We were elated to go back to China, especially since we found out we would be traveling with a family whom we met nearly four years ago when we adopted Kira. I thought this would be a great time to share some of Kira's heritage with her as well as introduce her to other adopted children from her birth country. I am not sure how much she will remember of this trip, but I am sure that bringing her along played a huge role in the bonding process between Shelby and her new family.

Bejing Day 1

The big climb up the Great Wall of China! I was so excited to go on this trek, only thing, no one mentioned "don't wear clogs". Who knew it wasn't the steep climb up but the hike down that would have me sliding forward in my shoes and hanging on to the railing (if I could get to one) for dear life. I had to laugh at myself because I sat down and watched hundreds of people climbing, even running up and down the steep grade. It was exhilarating to be at one of the Wonders of the World. Our guide was a hoot and gave us a brief history lesson and then we were on our own. We toured with another family, whom we came to adore and Kira just wouldn't leave them alone. She was so happy to play with other children and I was so relieved to see her in her element of play.

There were thousands of people climbing the wall, including many locals and school children.

Kira and her new family of friends talking to some Military Students. The students all wanted photos taken with this blonde haired family! They were very friendly and seemed to enjoy engaging in easy conversation.

Our Fabulous Tour Guide Arthur

Kira's new pal. The real way to climb the Great Wall.

We were all hanging on here on this incline up the other side of the wall.

This sweet lady kept me company while I proceeded to sit down for an hour's break. Then I thought wow, she has walked at least 2 miles straight up this wall and probably does it as a daily routine. She didn't speak any english, nor did I speak any Chinese dialect, but we managed to share some laughs and a lot of head nodding!

After a very long hike and meeting some amazing people, our fine Chariot awaited to take us back to our hotel. What fun this day had been.

Packing!

2011-10-25T04:51:00.001-07:00

Okay so I admit I "bring everything but the kitchen sink" when I have to travel, even if it's for two nights, so imagine a compulsive ADHD mother going overseas for two weeks! Where do I even begin and what should I bring, not so much for me but for Kira and her new sister. Also the new weight limits for luggage since we last traveled really had me narrow things down. But after two days of packing and un-packing I just can not control my excitement and emotions thinking that we are less than 23 hours from departure to China! So how can I concentrate on what I need to bring:)) Guess I should have started this two weeks ago. Anyway it's sort of fun to realize how organized I can be when I try to put my mind to it.

I am taking the necessities: toys for babes, disinfectant wipes, cold remedies, antibiotics (both Kira and I have sinus infections), gifts for orphanage and directors and the list of lists of documents we must bring. Then there are the tot snacks, Mom snacks and Franki Valli (Jersey Boys) CD's and Kira's favorite TV shows, her blankie and favorite sweatshirt.

We also packed a boat load of chocolate candy and twizzlers, so I can't complain that I didn't bring the right clothes, enough shirts or my instant Via Starbucks. I took my good friend Natalie's advice and brought Easy Mac for Kira since she thinks it is a food staple around here.

I have so wanted to re-do the blog and catch up but just didn't have the time. I am hoping we'll be able to blog or post photos from China. Those of you who want to email, please do as I know we can easily email and Skype.

Next post will hopefully be from Bejing!

Our Spicy Girl

2011-10-23T08:05:00.000-07:00

It has been way to long since I've updated this blog but I have been so busy with Kira and preparing the house for our newest addition, I couldn't sit down, nor think about what I wanted to intelligently write about. But before we leave for China I wanted to post some photos from this summer. My girl has grown and changed into the most precious little girl with a spunky, humorous and affectionate personality. I am still in total awe of Kira's love and adoration for her Daddy and I. She currently loves school, has a big crush on her male gymnastics coach and can not wait to start reading. She beats me at angry birds and well, she also knows how to shop online. I know, not the brightest move on my part, but one day I sat her down where she spent and hour or so adding mini-boden to her shopping cart! It's very funny to see her coordinate outfits!

How I love this child!

This summer she learned how to swim (thankfully) and her best stroke was "The Butterfly". She also started to learn to write and expressed an interest in art (it's all over the house, the walls, herself, the table and the occasional coloring book) yep, my girl wants to be an artist, a Princess and a Mommy (in no particular order).

Kira's expressions are so funny!

So while there is much to still do before the morning I thought I would post some of our memorable photos from mid-summer up to recently.

We're coming Shelby Emmalin, hang in there baby girl. We love you!

We have Visas!

2011-09-25T08:03:00.000-07:00

Oh this is truly fun, seeing the Chinese Visa in your passport! I know sounds silly but it's one step closer to our Shelby. After months of filing and waiting for more paperwork to be submitted , now it's down to purchasing our tickets and hotel reservations.

Also on my long shopping list of items to bring are various activities to entertain our Kira girl. She has been very interested in writing and drawing lately and absolutely loves mazes and tracing. Her art is so stinkin cute I'm going to have to frame some of it! Meanwhile Kira herself proudly displays her artwork via tape all over the house.
For the trip, I bought her activity books, crayons, and updated my phone with all sorts of fun inter-active games. In addition I told her she needs to pack her favorite toys to take with in her backpack. I guess size doesn't matter to a pre-schooler, because she has her blankie, sweatshirt and favorite stuffed animal(s) and princess tee shirts all ready to go.

So now it's onto the checklist of items we must bring, sort of must bring and would like to bring if we don't go over the weight limit of the luggage. It's hard because of the amount of clothing we need for two different climates (the colder weather in the North and her Provincial City and then the warmer climate of Guangzhou). I am trying to keep the clothing list down to one weeks worth of items that we can launder. We've certainly learned a lot from the first time and brought so much we didn't use or couldn't use. So now it's about necessity (for Momma: earplugs, ipod, valium, granola bars, dried mangoes, sweatpants and chapstick in no particular order).

I so want to bring my camera but the lens and camera body are pretty heavy and there is no such thing as an inexpensive Nikkor lens. I haven't checked out other compatable lenses but if there's time to do so, it may be worth it. We may just bring a small point and shoot, hey my iphone has more photos on it than my D700 these days, so perhaps that's all that's needed.

We also have our full Travel Itinerery and I'm so glad we are working with Lotus Travel again. They are fabulous having answered most of our questions already.

So for those who want to follow our blog here's the itinerary.
- Depart JFK International to Bejing on October 26th
- Arrive Beijing October 27th
- Check into big Hotel (forgot the name)
- Tour the Great Wall October 28th
- Holt Orientation October 29th and more fun tours of Bejing
- Depart Bejing for Gansu October 30th and receive our precious Shelby on arrival to Lanzhou
- Depart Gansu for Guangzhou (five days later also forgot those dates)
- Arrive Guangzhou for US Consulate Appointment
- Depart November 10th for USA!

Anticipation

2011-09-25T05:57:00.000-07:00

So now we wait for our I-800A and LOA till we know approximately when we'll be going to Gansu. We will have the surgeon write us a letter detailing the urgency for Baby Wu's surgery and hopefully USCIS will expedite our immigration paperwork.

For now some days I just sit and wonder how am I going to deal with one child in a hospital hours away and Kira home wondering what is going on??? I'd be a fool to not worry, but it's truly not good for me. I have to laugh because I have to have at least two bottles of Pepto Bismol on each floor because my stomach just hurts all the time. Hey the pink stuff works too. Then trying foolishly to get in shape I tore three ligaments in my left foot a month ago. So just to keep me company my dog broke his paw last week and now he's sporting a red cast like bandage. Yes, we may be injury prone around here, but thankfully nothing too serious. I think the worrying and ulcer issue may need some attention here soon. I try so hard to not think, perhaps that's the answer, don't think!

My biggest worry is financial now. While the adoption costs are covered, there's incidentals that will not be. I've never worried about finances before, but there are all the unknowns, such as where will we stay, how much will it cost and if we can't stay then I'll have to leave her in the hospital and drive back and forth daily. That's probably what I will do and though I know it's exhausting I can be with the baby and come home to be with Kira too. Well for now I'm going to take it day by day. I asked for some updated photos and we have to send our photos to her foster family.

Thankfully I have met some other parents with children who have gone through the surgery and are doing just fine now. I know that's the re-assurance I need right now. Everything else, including the money worries seem insignificant when I think of the lengthy surgery such a tiny child will have to endure. But again knowing she will be with the best team of professionals in the world in itself is soothing.

So for now. We wait for more documents and then our much anticipated letter for Travel Approval.

Hang in there sweet baby!

Hunan Spice is about to be Twice as Nice!

2011-09-21T13:16:00.000-07:00

We are done with the paperwork! This little girl is coming home, next month! Yippee:))

Last week we received our Travel Approval after a few months of waiting for the final paperwork to be completed. Now we have our dates and travel itinerary and we're waiting for our Visas. I was holding my emotions in check for almost 8 months now and when I look at this sweet face I can't believe she is going to be my daughter and I will soon be a Momma to two beautiful children. We are all so very excited, it's truly another blessing to be able to adopt another child and welcome her with open arms into our family.

Though I have not blogged for months I still wanted to blog about our journey to this very special little girl.

Because of the seriousness of her condition this blog will remain private. Quite honestly I wasn't going to blog at all but realize how much I miss documenting the milestones and it's a nice way to keep myself organized and occupied during nap time.

So where to start? How about her name! We decided after much thought that her Amercian name will be Miss Shelby Emmalin. Shelby is a name I chose as I wanted her named for my beloved Mother. Then we found and fell in love with her middle name Emmalin. I even think she looks like a Shelby!

These are the latest photos we received back in July after we sent her photos of us. She is finally smiling as she looks as her soon to be new big dog.

She is quite petite from the last update, standing 31 inches tall and weighing in at only 17 pounds. I know I did this before but totally forgot sizing for onesies, diapers and clothes. Well at least I'll bring warm clothes this time.

I have asked our agency if we can get another update on her feeding schedule too as she may still be using bottled milk. Already put away a few different pacifiers since from the looks of many photos she's quite attached to it and a little green ball given to her when she was in a hospital in Bejing.

My nerves are starting to get the best of me when I think of what the transition for her will be like. She is said to be very shy and close to her foster mother, so I am sure it will be very difficult for her. I think this is always the hardest part of the adoption process. While we can't wait to hug and love her, it may take her weeks or months to accept us. I remember how hard Kira cried after the orphanage directors handed her over to me. Oh my goodness it was heartbreaking and so I am preparing myself that this babe will be do the same. I guess you do what you can to console them, but ultimately it takes time and so much patience, love and understanding. Kira undoubtedly is excited and keeps asking when "are we getting my sister"? I tell her soon, very soon and she just smiles. Thank goodness Kira is such a sweet and affectionate little girl whom I know will play a major role in helping her sister make a smooth transition to her new home.

Now there is a checklist of things to bring with us, and I can't forget teething biscuits. Those were essential when we were in Hunan and I never thought of bringing them. I think it will be interesting to see how much I can fit in two suitcases!

So for now I am reminded of one of my favorite poems, which says so much in just a few paragraphs.

Legacy of an Adopted Child

Once there were two women who never knew each other,
One - you do not remember, the other you call mother.
Two different lives shaped to make yours,
One became your guiding star, the other became your sun.
The first gave you life, and the second taught you to live in it.
The first gave you a need for love and the second was there to give it.
One gave you a nationality; the other gave you a name.
One gave you the seed of talent; the other gave you an aim.
One gave you emotions; the other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile; the other dried your tears.
One gave you up - that's all she could do.
The other prayed for a child and God led her straight to you.
Now you ask through all your tears the age-old question through the years;
Heredity or environment - which are you a product of?
Neither, my darling - neither - just two different kinds of love.

Author Unknown

Great Fundraiser for Baby Wu's Surgery

2011-06-14T09:30:00.000-07:00

Well, I thought I would begin a little fundraising by doing an online auction at my photography blog
Simply Candid Photography.

There are so many wonderful people who have contributed and helped out and there will be more to add this week. I just wanted to get the party started!

So head on over and find some great props, accessories and other fun things!!!

Please feel free and spread the love. It will mean so much to us:))

Thank you for stopping by.

For the Love of our Daughter

2011-05-14T04:38:00.000-07:00

Finally some new photos of our Gansu Girl that came via Fedex a week ago. She's very cute and has those big eyes that Kira did at that age. I can't wait to finally hold her and comfort her. She has already been through so much recently, including studies of her kidneys and radiographs. I am hoping when she comes home we won't have to do too much medical stuff for at least a month so bonding can occur.

This is going to be a very big transition for all, especially for little Kira since she has been the center of my attention for the past three years. But, I have observed my daughter with other children all year long and sometimes I can't believe what I see. She'll bend over to comfort another crying child, or wipe their tears from their cheeks. She's done that to me and I think, how perceptive and grown up for just a 4 yrs old. She knows her sister has a boo boo that will need repair, but she doesn't know the extend and I don't think she can comprehend it so right now we're taking small steps. She will be a huge part of everything we do from here on out to help bring her sister home. That is for Certain!

My husband and I have sat down to try to tally up the financial responsibility of her life saving surgery, travel and lodging back and forth from NJ to Baltimore and other necessities. What we didn't realize was how very expensive these incidentals will be. Although our Adoption costs are covered, when we accepted Wu's referral we did not realize her hospitalization would be 6-12 weeks. We had to choose John's Hopkin's for her procedure, because she only has one shot at obtaining normal bladder function this hospital is one of the top ranking hospital for the treatment of her condition. I have no doubt this was a good decision. There are only a handful of hospitals in this country that perform this surgery (Boston's Children Hospital, The Mayo Clinic, Seattle Children's Hospital) an well JH's seemed close enough.

It is my greatest hope that through the next few months we can raise a little bit of money so that I or my husband can stay with the baby during her hospital course. We are looking into every possible scenario so that bonding time and Kira's routine are not inter-rupted. With a few decent and fun fundraisers it's my hope that I get to spend at least one night a week with her while Dani is home with Kira. Dani say's he'll sleep in the chair next to her bed and I had to laugh because having worked in many Intensive Care Units, No One Sleeps! Not even the patients. But I hold my hat off to him wanting to be there as much as possible. I know it will be an exhausting and emotional time in the hours and days post-op, but I also have already spoke to some special professionals at John's Hopkins whom are more than familiar with out of town patients who come there for their expertise.

So for now we have a Fun Run, Bike Ride and some other ideas that have come our way. I am making some awesome photography props and think that a fun auction of items for photographers would be nice to start off with.

It's difficult to ask people to help, especially in this day of a depressed economy, but in my heart I know we can do it. Even if we knew how much the surgery would cost before the adoption, I could never turn this child away because there are no alternatives for her. So I'll swallow my pride and take it one step at a time!

The Beauty Beyond a Photo

2011-05-01T07:03:00.000-07:00

"The Laughter of girls is,

and ever was,

among the Delightful

Sounds of the earth."

Author: Dequincey

So I keep telling Kira that I need some photos of her to send to her baby sister and last week she agreed to go on a photo shoot in the woods (actually) the golf course. I would be happy if she let me do this every day, but I'll settle for every few months if I can capture images such as these. Honestly, while I was working on them I couldn't help but think how cute her face is and then I started thinking about the second part of her surgery that will most like change some of her facial features. I told my husband I'll let them close the palate, but "that's it"! I love her nose and three dimples and the way she smiles and makes squinchy faces at me. But for now I want to enjoy everything about what makes Kira so special. Her physical beauty captivates me daily, but the beauty within her astounds me.

Kira has a way of making everything fun!

These are her "Surprises" big sweet baby kisses for Mommy!

And of course there is her famous pouty face, but love it:))

Every now and then I capture a glimpse of the young woman she'll become and

she just has a way of melting my heart.

At 39 inches tall and barely 30 lbs, she's still just my pint sized sweetie who delights me with her play, wisdom and her enthusiasm.

As Mother's Day approaches, this child reminds me daily how very fortunate I am to be HER Mommy!

There is something wonderful about Adoption

2011-04-25T17:58:00.000-07:00

I know so many of my friends and family are waiting to see more photos of our new baby girl but I have been pre-occupied by daydreams! Honestly I am still overwhelmed by the fact we really are going to have another daughter and a little babe at that:))

My heart is full of joy, because adoption has changed my life for the better. I have learned that I am a better person, because I am my daughter's mother. I have learned that I can love unconditionally and only want the best for my daughter(s). I have concluded that this job of motherhood is harder than any job any person can take on, but it's more than it's weight in gold. And, I have realized that adoption transcends all boundries and you realize you are stronger than you ever thought as are the children. I am still learning and recently discovered how I've become a bit over protective this time around, of both girls. Perhaps it's because of the nature of her defect or just normal concern. Now I have two girls to worry about!!! It's a totally different scenario trying to prepare a tenacious 4 year old for a sibling. Kira has become very inquisitive about everything, often asking questions that take me completely off guard. Such as "Why was my sister hatched in China?" yes, she did say that and now asks "Is my sister okay"? I have explained in very simple terms the nature of her boo boo and thankfully there are many resources available to help me.

We received more photos a few weeks ago but most of them were blurred. As I rushed to open each jpeg I would carefully look at her face, tiny little fingers and think how perfect she is! Then I came upon this photo, actually pretty good quality and thought my goodness, she is so beautiful, with big almond eyes that seem to speak to your heart! I completely melt when I look at her face and the first time I printed it off, Kira grabbed it and hugged the photo. I of course, cried, then wiped my face so Kira didn't get upset. I feel like a complete emotional wreck sometimes because I know all too well the challenges and pain this baby is going through and will continue to go through till she is surgically corrected.

There is something beautiful and wonderful about adoption and right now I just can't seem to put it all into words. I now understand things I never would have, had I not been give the chance to parent a child. I also bask in the sweetness of innocence and laughter that takes me back to my own happy childhood memories.

She's so sweet I smile every time I look at her face!

Thinking about the Children of China

2011-04-12T12:34:00.000-07:00

Since the day we arrived home with Kira, my husband and I fell in love with our daughter's birth country and desired to adopt again one day. Now three years later, we completed another Dossier for a special needs child from China. Two weeks ago were accepted as the proud parents for a sweet 16 month old baby girl from Gansu Province in the People's Republic of China. She is a very special little girl indeed and we all so happy that she will be joining our family soon.

My days and nights are filled with the chattering of little Kira and her never ending desire for knowledge. She seems to want to catch up on things and lately starts out every sentence with "I have a question Mommy". It's so cute, and most of the time her questions are fairly simple. But at this time, she doesn't really want to discuss her little sister, but will add that "she can have my old clothes" or "I want to come to help fix her boo boo". Kira is thoughtful, compassionate and certainly wise beyond her 4 yrs. She also asked me why I had to go to China to get her, because I told Kira that her sister is with other very special babies that do not have parents. It think that's when she stopped the conversation and changed the subject. Preparing Kira for this arrival will be tougher than anything I really expected. She is very attached to me, though happy eager to get to school so she can play with all her friends Recently she does have "Daddy time" and I love hearing her question him and giggle on and on. But the reality is our new little addition will require a lengthy surgical procedure and 5 week hospitalization at John's Hopkin's in Maryland. So I am now trying to figure out all the logistics of how to swing bonding with Baby Wu Ke Xiu while not affecting Kira for weeks on end. It occured to me to ask if siblings can stay wtih during the long hospitalization, especially since we'll be from out of town. I so hope so, because this is such a crucial part of bonding for us all. However, the baby will be sedated for the most part, from what I understand. I won't kid myself by saying I am not frightened by it all too, but I have to do what's best for both girls and know staying strong, keeping Kira informed and happy and trying to stay focused will be my goals.

We have the absolute best agency in the World, Holt International Children's Services, whom I like to consider my extended family as they truly look out for both the child they are matching and the families they want to place the children with. I have worked a bit with Holt over the years, trying to advocate via webinars and writing articles describing our experience in the hope that other waiting families will consider the special needs route, or as Holt now calls it, the "Child of Promise Option". These are children with fairly correctable conditions or sometimes just older kiddies who for some reason, did not get adopted when they were younger. As most of our friends and family know Kira had her cleft lip and palate repaired and will require another surgery next year to finally close her palate. We decided to be more open to a child with a more extensive need such as a heart defect or perhaps another clefting issue. We also wanted the children to be closer in age or perhaps the same age. However, it would all depend on the referrals that Holt were receiving monthly. But when we got Baby Wu's referral, she has a condition called Classic Bladder Exstrophy, something I never hear of, let alone knew exactly what it meant. But I could not stop looking at her beautiful face, her long eyelashes, tulip lips and long fingers. I gazed over every inch of her face and just wanted to hold her as tightly as possible. No doubt she is a most gorgeous child. Then one by one we looked at all the photos till we got to the photo that shows her condition.

I must say the first thing that entered my mind was how much pain this child must be in all the time. Her bladder was sitting right outside her tiny abdomen and urine just leaks continually onto raw skin. The rash on her bottom was awful to look at, her entire bottom was bright red with open sores and tears just filled my eyes. Then just when I thought I was going to loose it, there was another updated photo of her bottom with the rash and sores all healed. A sense of relief came over me knowing that somehow she was now receiving some sort of medication to help prevent skin breakdown. Immediately I got on the internet and called the resources we were given to see exactly what her condition was about and who and where we would consult for surgical correction. It took perhaps a few days to get the information we needed to make the decision to accept her referral. One of the many important people I spoke with was, Dr. John Gearhart a delightful children's urologist who will be performing her surgery. He was so optimistic and re-assuring that he could help her, I just sighed. He then put me in contact with another family, in fact a nurse who adopted her son with the same condition 11 years ago. She too was sweet and re-assuring, especially about the hospitalization part. I felt so much better speaking to families of children with this defect and even watching you-tube videos of teens and how they are dealing with self-esteem. Pretty amazing in my opinion.

So for now, we wait until our Immigration paperwork gets done. We have received more photos and even a video clip yesterday. I'm not sure how to upload it, so I'm posting mostly on Facebook since it's easier!

Will follow up shortly with some fabulous photos.

If anyone is interested in this there is so much information, you just need to know where to look. I came upon this video and instantly knew that there was no more research to be done!

Spring is Finally Here!

2011-03-20T10:12:00.000-07:00

We are so glad that Spring is here! Just as quickly as the snow melt, there are trees already to blossom.

I am quite amazed how my girl has blossomed too, for instance she's now an official Frankie Valli fan, and must listen to "Big Girls Don't Cry" (which I shall reminder of next time we're trying to check out without buying M&M's or Skittles)! She is desperately trying to read, and insists on reading no less than 3 books before bed. I love her new found interest in reading and music (I've even caught her singing too her babies), awh nothing is as magical as the mind of a child.

I Love how she knows where to put her fingers on the frets

I know I used to write so much more, but I think these photos speak to the personality of my tot much more than I can.

February Musings

2011-03-05T10:31:00.000-08:00

I admit, I'm a slacker when it comes to blogging these days. I find it amusing that my tot and her activities can keep me so busy, and these are just the pre-school years!!! However she loves to dance and go to gymnastics and I so love watching her.

So when I'm not on Facebook or editing photos, I try to convince Kira to model for me. It's not that easy and believe me, things go flying around the room. However, I did manage to capture some amazing images this month and as I go through them, I can actually see how my daughters' toddler face is emerging into more of a little girl now. She's got the cutest dimples and a smile that always melts my heart. I still pinch myself, yes three years later, to remind me how fortunate I am to be her mother:))

Happy Birthday Sweet Child

2011-01-20T03:18:00.000-08:00

Yes, my child is turning 4 years old today! I can not believe it because I think I am still on "pause" mode, trying to preserve the previous 3 years to the best of my ability. I watched her at a year old trying to take her first steps and make sense of adorable babble. Now she can out run the fastest toddlers in town and yes (it's hard to believe) but she can actually out talk me, her Momma!!! It's hilarious.

Kira is truly a Mommy's girl, which I absolutely love especially when she tries to intentionally act older by softly telling me to "go over there Momma so I can make some friends" and then as evening falls she will cuddle up with her favorite blankie, sweatshirt, book and pj's and want me to hold her "very tight" till she drifts off to sleep. I savor these moments especially because she's just so busy all day! When she's finally fast asleep I look down at her and still see a baby. I stare at her wondering if she'll remember these tender moments, but for certain I will.

This child is so very special in so many ways, not because she's my daughter but because of her innate ability to comfort others. Her personality is evolving but she remains so giving, loving and affectionate to her parents and family. She's concerned and asks many questions, which I try to answer on her level. She's maintained an incredible sense of humor that still amazes and surprises me. Loving her is easy and so natural and I smile to myself thinking how fortunate and proud I am to be her mother.

So we wish you a wonderful Birthday sweet Kira as you continue to grow and explore your world. You remain the center of our world, today and always.

You are so very loved!

January Ramblings

2011-01-19T13:14:00.000-08:00

I so can not believe that it is January already! Our third Gotcha Day was on January 7th, last Friday. It feels like yesterday when I first held this child, my gorgeous baby girl in my arms (only now she's 20 lbs heavier) and it's been three entire years? Okay, so now I see what everyone means when they say "they grow up fast", it's true. I had to look at a few videos of her as a baby to realize how grown up she is now. It is strange to hear her babbling back then and think "when is she going to talk"? Now it's the reverse, I try to recall those first few months as a new mother and remember how awkward it was to ease on into my new job. Yikes there was no internship or mentoring, more like flying by the seat of one's pants! Fortunate for me I did have amazing role models, my Mother and my sister who happily advised me when needed.

I know I re-made this blog so I would write more often, yet somehow I can't find enough hours in the day to write or perhaps it's that I'm too tired or java'd out and can't sit still:)) yeah, that's more like it and explains my insomnia.

My photography has slacked off because I dropped my camera, BUT bought a full frame Nikon to replace it and if there was ever motivation to go and pursue my business this camera is it. The photos are magnificent directly out of the camera. I have been contemplating (before my other camera fell to the ground) buying another 1/2 framed Nikon but my husband surprised me with the D700 and I can see for sure why it's worth the money! This time around I'm insuring this expensive piece of equipment, including accidental falls. Anyway I did manage to get some amazing photos of Kira and even with slow shutter, ISO and aperture wide open, there was barely any blur, except when the tot started throwing things at me.

So now I'm also trying to get creative and sort out the toys, photos, learning books and make my living room look "user friendly", well I guess it is user friendly, perhaps neat and tidy, or just clean would be more like it. I've lost track on how many times I've tripped over a block, shoe or some technological talking toy. I need cabinets, drawers and shelves stacked at least to the ceiling. Just can't decide what kind of look to go for. Crate and Barrel, PB or Home Depot. It doesn't matter as long as the toys get put away by the end of the week LOL!

For now, the holidays have passed and a New Year is here. I didn't make any resolutions, but decided I do need to get out more, exercise and eat better (dried mangoes and soy lattes don't count as protein and veggies) Also bought a work out tape, but find watching others working out more interesting and less breathless. I remember the good old days when I would ski hours on end, or work hours on end (without a break) and now wonder how I did it. Maybe more soy lattes??? Actually I was recently introduced to the WII or some facsimile there of and found it so much fun. Hmmm, next investment perhaps!

Okay enough rambling for now. Some of my favorite photos of my babe "working it" as she says when she allows me to take some photos of her.

Happy New Year!

2010-12-31T09:16:00.000-08:00

Some Fav's from 2010

In just a few hours a brand we will all be celebrating a brand New Year. I really can not comprehend how quickly time marches on and as I gaze at my sweet toddler I can't help but realize how fast the past few years have gone by.

I remember how I couldn't wait for her to talk, though now I listen to her tiny voice chattering on and on and that is just within this past year. She's so independent and refuses my help, in fact she told me to "go and sit down so I can make friends" this summer in the pool. Gasp! I didn't realize nosy Mom's could hinder toddler friendships this early. She also informed me and everyone she meets that she has a "boyfriend, named B who likes dinasaurs" and proceeded to place his photo next to hers in the living room wall. She greets people in the market by asking their name and admiring nail polish or jewelry and can easily carry on a decent phone conversation. Yep, just couldn't wait to hear her putting words together and now she "pretend" reads and is starting to sound out words. I have no clue if this is age appropriate for toddlers and can't take credit as I surely do not speak spanish in the house and Kira is often found counting and addressing her dolls in spanish! Guess I owe Nick Jr. for that. I now wonder what effect Looney Tunes had on me LOL (I shouldn't even answer that)!

Anyway, my thoughts are on the coming year as I now try not to rush through life. This past year was my 35th High School Renunion and again I sighed, cried and laughed at the memories and wondered where did those years go. I suppose we keep so busy, it's natural to not gage time in years. Now I cuddle with Kira during bedtime, holding her ever so tightly and realize every day how she breathes fresh air into my world and how much I appreciate my daughter for the little girl she is becoming.

2010 has been an interesting year, in politics, world affairs and in our home! Since I haven't written much during the past year I plan to keep this blog up to the best of my ability.

So to my Dear Family and Friends I wish you all the very best in 2011, mostly harmony, good health and the ability to continue to nurture and continue to create the happy memories we will eventually look back upon.

Have a safe and wonderful New Year!

Tiny Dancer

2010-12-21T08:50:00.000-08:00

A few months back we were in a store and Kira was playing with a jewelry box with a little ballerina twirling atop it. She asked me what it was and I tried to explain. So for the coming weeks she expressed in her words, "I want to be a ballereen". So what's a Momma to do, why of course start ballet classes! Not sure if she was enjoying this new venture, I asked if I could photograph the girls as they practiced for the upcoming Holiday show. What impressed me was how much fun Kira was having, spinning, twirling and inter-acting with the other children. It was so cute to watch them I couldn't help but smile the entire time.

The day of the show I made sure that Kira received official "stage pampering", you know the updew, facial makeup, sparkles, mani/pedi and matching lipstick and body sparkles. It was fun putting on her makeup, she even enjoyed mascara.

Then the dancers were called to line up and head to the stage down the hall. I grabbed my gear, ran to the theatre just in time to see them perform. AND THERE SHE WAS, my little Sugar Plum, STAGE RIGHT...just standing there looking for me, the entire performance! Well at least she didn't run off the stage (they had stage catchers just in case)! She proudly and gracefully bowed to the audience as everyone clapped and promptly fell asleep in the car on the way home.

Ok, first, you pay careful attention to the dance teacher,

Then you think "should I eat my pb and j or get in front of a huge crowd and cry:))

Then again this is a pretty Ballereen Dress

So she carefully observes the other dancers, takes her friends hand, and then...she dances!

in perfect form, at home!

That's my girl, I so love you.

Welcome to our new blog!

2010-12-10T11:01:00.000-08:00

Welcome to my new and improved blog makeover!

I am so happy with my new blog and want to send a huge shout out to Rita of Coffee Shop Designs for creating our new refreshing and inspiring look. I wanted something elegant yet simple and would showcase my reason for blogging, my Spicy tot, Kira Isabella.

Writing has always been an outlet of expression for many kinds of emotions and/or for teaching methods. So I am sure I will back on the road expressing what I feel is important as well as bragging with some great photographs of my daughter.

I have missed documenting so many of the good things this year, I guess I have a lot to catch up on. For now, I'll share our Holiday portrait that many of you will be receiving soon. Well though I love photographing children, my girl will do just about anything to stray away from the camera. She has grown into a little girl this past year, a very mature little girl I must say. She wears her heart on her sleeve, is about as stubborn as any tot should be and when I capture one of her "famous" funny faces as she calls them, she truly melts my heart. I simply love her surprise kisses and those tiny dimples:))

Fall is in the air, Finally!

2010-09-10T08:38:00.001-07:00

EITHER IT WAS ONE HOT SUMMER OR I'VE BECOME VERY HEAT INTOLERANT! I'M JUST SO HAPPY TO FEEL THE COOL FALL BREEZE AND SLEEP WITH THE WINDOWS OPEN AGAIN.

THE LAST FEW DAYS WERE SO PRETTY AND WINDY, KIRA AND I MADE A FEEBLE ATTEMPT AT KITE FLYING YESTERDAY AND THEN WE BROUGHT OUT HER 12 INCH BICYCLE AND WENT FOR A LITTLE RIDE, OR I SHOULD SAY SHE WENT FOR THE RIDE. SHE'S SO LIGHT THAT THE WIND BLEW HER CLEAR DOWN THE BLOCK! GUESS I SHOULD HAVE MADE THE TOT RIDE INTO THE WIND!

WE ARE GEARING UP FOR A NEW PRE-SCHOOL PROGRAM THREE DAYS A WEEK AND SOME MAJOR SHOPPING FOR CLOTHES, FOR KIRA OF COURSE. MY LIGHT WEIGHT HAS GROWN AND I THINK HER PUDGY BABY THIGHS ARE NOW OFFICIALLY TODDLER MUSCLES. SHE'S 37 INCHES TALL NOW WEIGHING IN AT A WHOPPING 28 POUNDS! BUT DON'T LET THAT FOOL YA, SHE CAN LEAD A 100 POUND DOG AROUND LIKE A COUPLE OF POODLES.

KIRA'S WORLD:

THIS CHILD CONTINUES TO AMUSE AND AMAZE ME AS I AM PRIVILEGED ENOUGH TO WITNESS HER DAILY ANTICS. SHE HAS BECOME QUITE PROFICIENT AT STORY TELLING AND WILL BEGIN A SENTENCE WITH "REMEMBER THE OTHER DAY WHEN..."

I JUST LOVE IT AND HAVE NO IDEA WHERE SHE GOT THAT FROM. SHE UNDERSTANDS THAT I HAVE NO CLUE HOW TO GET SOMEWHERE WITHOUT A GPS, WHICH IS QUITE EMBARRASSING (ESPECIALLY WHEN SHE HAS TO TELL ME TO TURN AROUND). SHE KNOWS HER ADDRESS AND CAN WRITE HER NAME WHICH IMPRESSES ME BECAUSE ON ANY GIVEN DAY I CAN'T REMEMBER MY OWN PHONE NUMBER!

HER LOVE AND GENEROSITY CONTINUES TO BLOSSOM AND SHE UNDERSTANDS THAT "SHARING MAKES US HAPPY" on most days!

FAVORITE TOYS:

MY iMAC

THE PRINCESSES DOLLS

DINOSAURS

BINOCULARS

PAINTING AND COLORING (ALL OVER THE WALLS, CARPET, HERSELF)

JUMPING ON THE "PRAMPOLINE" AS SHE CALLS IT (I THINK TODDLER LANGUAGE IS SO CUTE).

FAVORITE TV SHOWS:

DORA AND DIEGO

OSWALD AND WEENIE

BACKYARDIGANS

ELMO

FAVORITE MOVIES:

SHREK

AND SHREK 2

ARIEL

NEMO

AVATAR

FAVORITE BOOKS:

ANYTHING PRINCESS OR MERMAID RELATED

BARON AND FLUFFY

DO LIKE A DUCK DOES

THE POUT POUT FISH

GOODNIGHT MOON (MY ALL TIME FAVORITE)

FAVORITE FOODS:

MAC AND CHEESE!

PIZZA

CHICKEN FINGERS

YES IT WAS A SWEET SUMMER FOR SO MANY REASONS. I AM HAPPY THAT AUTUMN IS IN THE AIR AND BOTH KIRA AND I ARE LOOKING FORWARD TO NEW ADVENTURES.

I LOVE YOU SWEET, PRECIOUS KIRA!

A Calender like no other

2010-08-17T05:14:00.001-07:00

MY SWEET FRIEND, MICHELLE CONTACTED ME ASKING IF I COULD SEND SOME PHOTOS OF KIRA FOR THIS AMAZING CALENDER SHE WAS HELPING TO PUT TOGETHER. ALL THE MONEY IS DONATED TO HELP CHINESE ORPHANS.

SO PLEASE GO TO HER SITE AND CHECK OUT THE AMAZING GIVEAWAY, PROBABLY THE BEST ALL YEAR IF YOU'RE A PHOTOGRAPHER!

Pre-School to Princeton

2010-08-01T18:17:00.001-07:00

SHE MELTS MY HEART!

RECENTLY, BOTH KIRA AND I SEEM TO ENJOY EXPLORING NEW PLACES (or perhaps she just gets a kick out of the fact that I get lost with my GPS). LAST WEEK WE VISITED A NEW PRE-SCHOOL PROGRAM AND IT JUST SO HAPPENED THAT THE FOLLOWING DAY WE TOOK AN EXCURSION TO PRINCETON UNIVERSITY. I'VE NEVER BEEN THERE BUT AS SOON AS I GAZED AT THE OLD HOMES ALONG THE ROAD LEADING TO THE UNIVERSITY I FELL IN LOVE WITH THIS TOWN. QUAINTLY HISTORIC, I WONDERED HOW MANY GENIUSES WALKED THE EXACT SAME PATHS WE WERE STROLLING ALONG. I LOOKED AROUND AT ALL THE POTENTIAL STUDENTS TAKING SUMMER TOURS AND YIKES THEY ALL LOOKED SO YOUNG! IT MADE ME WANT TO GO BACK TO COLLEGE; THE YEARS OF WONDERMENT, ADVENTURE AND, YES THE ACQUISITION OF KNOWLEDGE (IF YOU COULD STAY AWAKE DURING CLASS)!

A GOOD SUGAR FIX WILL HELP DURING LONG CLASSES!

I LOOKED DOWN AT KIRA AND REALIZED SHE TOO IS STARING SOMEWHAT INQUISITIVELY TOWARDS THE BEAUTIFUL STONE AND GRANITE BUILDINGS. EXCITINGLY SHE YELLS OUT, "MOMMA LOOK AT ALL THE PRINCESS CASTLES!"

SOME OF THESE ARE ACTUALLY DORMS.

SURE ENOUGH THESE MAGNIFICENT STONE STRUCTURES DID RESEMBLE CASTLES. IN FACT, PRINCETON IS THE FOURTH OLDEST COLLEGE AND ONE OF THE MOST BEAUTIFUL UNIVERSITIES IN THE UNITED STATES. THE GOTHIC VICTORIAN ARCHITECTURE TAKES YOU BACK IN TIME, WAY BACK TO THE 12TH CENTURY, WITH SPIRES REACHING SKYWARD AND BEAUTIFULLY DETAILED ARCHES THAT BECKON YOU THROUGH PASSAGES LEADING TO EVEN MORE SPECTACULAR ARCHITECTURE.

NASSAU HALL (1756)

ONE OF MY FAVORITE MOVIES "A BEAUTIFUL MIND" WAS FILMED HERE, STARRING RUSSELL CROWE. IN FACT THE PROFESSOR HE PORTRAYED, JOHN NASH IS STILL ON FACULTY HERE.

I CAN ONLY SAY THAT I FELT SO INSPIRED AS I WALKED BY THE HUNDREDS OF CLASSROOMS. WHILE THERE MAY NOT HAVE BEEN "PRINCESSES" HOUSED IN THE CASTLE LIKE BUILDINGS, THE FUTURE OF MODERN TECHNOLOGY, SCIENCE, GOVERNMENT AND BUSINESS WILL LIKELY TAKE PLACE BY ALL THE BEAUTIFUL MINDS THAT ATTEND STUDYING TO MAKE THEIR MARK IN THIS WORLD!

Toddler Logic

2010-07-11T06:06:00.000-07:00

A FEW WEEKS AGO, I PACKED THE CAR AND HEADED OFF TO THE GARDENS. OH YES, 5 CUTE OUTFITS A FEW BALLOONS, LOT'S OF BOWS AND RIBBONS AND CANDY FOR BRIBE TACTICS. THAT'S JUST A BIT OF WHAT I HAVE TO DO TO GET SOME FUN PHOTOS OF HER. I FIGURED BY NOT TAKING PHOTOS OF HER EVERY DAY SHE WILL EVENTUALLY LET ME TAKE JUST A FEW. WHAT WAS I THINKING?

WE CHASED SOME BUTTERFLIES AND I WATCHED KIRA PLAY, ROMPING AS USUAL AND EVEN STOPPING TO MAKE FRIENDS WITH ANOTHER LITTLE GIRL. NOW I MANAGED TO GET JUST A FEW PHOTOS BEFORE WE HEADED BACK HOME.

NOW THESE ROCKS LOOK FUN TO WALK ON!

MAKING SURE MOMMA IS NOT FAR BEHIND.

THERE WERE SO MANY PRETTY FLOWERS AND AWESOME INTERESTING PROPS FOR ME TO USE, SUCH AS THIS BEAUTIFUL BRIDGE.

I FIGURE THAT I'LL GET THE TOT ON THE BRIDGE, RUN AHEAD AND SNAP THE PIC.

ONLY I FORGET HOW FAST THIS CHILD RUNS AND RUNS AND RUNS!

WHAT I DIDN'T REALIZE WAS JUST AS I RAN AHEAD OF HER TO COMPOSE THIS PHOTO, SHE TOOK HER SKIRT OFF AND THREW IT, PRACTICALLY OVER THE BRIDGE...AND AS I TRIED TO STEADY THE CAMERA WHILE I WAS LAUGHING, I HEARD HER SAY "NO MORE PICTURES MOMMY"!

INDEED SHE WAS DETERMINED TO NOT HAVE HER PICTURE TAKEN AND FIGURED IF SHE LOOSES THE SKIRT, THE CAMERA WILL ALSO GET LOST! HOW I LOVE TODDLER LOGIC. SO WE BOTH GOT WHAT WE WANTED AND I'M GOING TO SAVE THIS PHOTO TO SHOW HER WHEN SHE'S UH HMMM, 20 SOMETHING!

Summer is Here!

2010-06-23T10:50:00.000-07:00

YES, summer has arrived and so have the heat waves! The 90 degree humid weather is certainly a challenge when my little tot wants to run outdoors and prefers to water the plants rather than play in her pool. However, we manage to find weeds to pick, butterflies to chase and a few cloudy days where we take advantage of some cute photos in the woods.

Yes I know you love to get your Mommy soaked! Actually this is Kira's way of getting the camera out of her face!

Recently I found a really fun place to chase bunnies and take some photos. I grab the camera and try to get Kira to "work it" for me as I bribe her with a lollipop or cookie. She's so funny after a bit of suger and will put her hands on her hip and say "work it, work it" as I snap away. Here's some of the cutest photos I've seen:))

HOW I LOVE THIS FACE AND THOSE DIMPLES!

I sort of wonder how a child instinctively knows that a rain puddle was made so that he/she can jump in it. I still can't figure this out because I haven't seen it on Dora or Kai Lan, but then again I did the same thing and there were no TV shows to mimic, well a few perhaps. So what does a Momma do when her tot comes upon a puddle of water? I SAY JUMP AND HAVE SOME FUN!!! The smallest puddle allows for some great big smiles and adventures.

Before puddle
jumping

AND after, ah how good this feels!

Yes this does bring back some fond memories as I will admit I did this too! The cool puddles felt so good on my feet as I would splash and entertain myself so effortlessly. So watching this child of mine have so much fun this day made me glad I brought my camera to capture her childish enthusiasm for simple and real fun.

June Ramblings

2010-06-07T05:08:00.000-07:00

Yes I know, blogging has taken a back seat these days, mostly because I don't have the time, but so want to keep archiving because I love writing, it's so soothing to me and very important that I continue to journal this special child that I absolutely adore!

Of course the reason for my posts are hopefully filled with the musing of childhood as I continue to watch my baby girl do and say the silliest things. While it's been a most difficult and emotional year for me personally, I remain focused on my family and child, the passions of my life.

So here's a bit of Kira's personality at the sweet age of three.

Kira remains an incredibly sweet and affectionate child. She loves giving and receiving hugs and kisses. Most recently she is fascinated by newborns and adores peeking in a stroller and asking me to look at the baby with her. At her pre-school she adores the younger children and will even share Elmo with them. That's a huge step considering in the fall, she wanted to bite anyone that came between her and the little guy. Thank goodness she grew out of that!

She's very much a sweet and pleasant little girl who interacts with adults as much as her peers.

She has become very vocal and is quite able to make her issues known. Yes there are those "meltdown" moments, which now I know are related to hunger or exhaustion (now that I think about it, I have them too) or just wanting my attention

Her most recent interests are dressing up in her various princess outfits and playing with her little people toy house. No she hasn't forgotten about her buddy Elmo, she usually puts him to bed early, neatly tucking him under some blanket that I find behind the couch or under a table. We tried to get a cute baby carriage for her to wheel her little buddy around in, however the cat proceeded to pee in it and hence it ended in the trash. In fact the cat and the dog have been just a tad jealous, but I do try and spread my affections:))

I did catch Kira yelling at the cat (as if that cat really cared) a few weeks back. These were her words "Cat, no more peeing on my toys! You're going to go to time out, you hear me?" So on went the conversation as she shook her finger at cat. Then I couldn't help but scratch my head and say to myself "is that how I really sound"? I think so which is very funny because it doesn't take a child behavior specialist to tell me that making ideal threats of going to time out is just that!

Kira loves her new big girl bed, but I don't! Yep, I'm very co-dependent on her. On nights that I can't sleep I gently scoop her up and bring her into my bed with me. Although lately, the kick boxing to my head are getting more severe when she wants to wake me. The evenings are precious as she loves me to read to her. So I must grab at least 10 long books and we proceed to read and read and read...."momma, you're snoring" and then I awaken and read some more, till the tot drifts off into dreamland.

WHY Momma, WHY? The question that starts every sentence these days! Inquisitive child, then again I ask the same questions too when I want answers! In fact I believe that children ask why because they want more than just a simple explanation. Perhaps adults believe tots are limited in comprehension skills therefore we keep answers "short" and "simple", but the persistent "why" leaves me to believe they're fully capable of longer and simple answers. So the persistent "why is Ariel in the ocean" question was met with several different answers that kept her entertained and fascinated. I am confident that's how a good child's story gets written.

Now to my amazement Kira can manuever the computer mousepad, pick and choose her own games, trouble shoot and probably re-boot it if necessary! No longer can I hide the fact that I'm editing on the computer, she'll yell "no more puter Mommy", I just love it. After all she is right.

So that's a quick summary of my little Spicy Girl for now. It's difficult getting her on camera these days, but some of her photos are just precious.

I so adore you baby girl, you make my heart sing!

"Faces and Flowers" Photo Challenge

2010-05-17T20:46:00.000-07:00

It's no big surprise that I LOVE FLOWERS! In fact over 25 years ago I realized just how much I loved photography while photographing the wildflowers around the glacier lakes in Colorado. I am glad I got a kick start in the art of photography while living out there!

So when I found out that the theme for Iheartfaces this week was "faces and flowers" I grabbed the camera, clothed the tot and when trekking off to find a good location to get a great photo. Now wildflowers are easy to photograph in comparison to my little tot! Yep, she'll do anything to avoid the camera, even throwing her favorite snack at me. So I had to be clever and tell her we were searching for bunnies and don't you know, there were bunnies where we went. So in fact I captured a few smiles, but mostly some of the most beautiful photos I think I have ever taken of my daughter.

Of all the photos where she was almost looking at me and smiling today, I just fell in love with this one. So thank you sweet daughter for allowing me to take a few photos of you today!

Go on over to Iheartfaces and see some of the most darling entries!

Back for Spring!

2010-05-17T20:10:00.000-07:00

Yes I've been missing from blog land the past few months and have also missed blogging! Mostly because this blog is about my daughter and I know in a few months from now I'll forget the little things that make me smile ear to ear on a daily basis.

Over the past few months, this child has gone from shy to outgoing, diapers to "princess" big girl panties and can not only count to 10 in english, but spanish as well. I have to agree I was shocked that she learned spanish so quickly and recently has started to enjoy hearing her vocal ranges, which really cracks me up! I'm not talking about singing either...little miss sassy pants has a way of asserting herself around her 110lb dog (who really runs away at this point), she thinks by barking louder than him, or screaming in his ear, he'll move out of her way or stop barking. So needless to say the house gets very noisy.

My daughter delights me in every way. She is very intuitive and sensitive and seems to pay very close attention to emotions lately, often asking me why characters in a book are sad or happy. She even flushed the Little Mermaid down the toilet so that she could get to the ocean to find her prince! So no harm done, no plumber needed, I thought that was pretty smart actually, but Daddy wasn't as amused.

This must be an innate toddler question... every sentence begins with "why" and usually ends with me changing the subject after the 20th "why" question! Needless to say I think I've met my match as far as who can out talk who in this house, guess I never really knew I had a gift for gab till I see Kira imitating me.

Not a day goes by that I don't think about how fortunate I am to have this child as my daughter. She keeps me on my toes for sure and always thinking and searching for the right answers to so many of her questions. I'm happy she's easily entertained and wants to play with her Momma. I know all too well how quickly time moves on, so I'm going to cherish her milestones and love every single day!

A Trip to Longwood Gardens

2010-02-24T20:35:00.001-08:00

OH HOW I LOVE THIS CHILD!

SUCH A BEAUTY!

AND PRETTY SMART TOO, SHE KNOWS WHERE THE MONEY IS HIDING!

ALWAYS CURIOUS AND SMILING!

AWH, THAT FAMOUS LOOK OF KIRA'S.

THE GORGEOUS ORCHIDS OF LONGWOOD GARDENS

PREPARING TO GET A LITTLE WET HERE.

ABOUT 2WKS AFTER THE BIG BLIZZARD AND THEY STILL HAD ALMOST 3FT OF SNOW ON THE GROUND OUTSIDE.

INSIDE WHERE THE AROMATHERAPY WAS OH SO DELIGHTFUL TO THE SENSES.

MAKING FUNNY FACES.

WE SURE TRY TO MAKE SEVERAL TRIP TO LONGWOOD GARDENS A YEAR AND THE ORCHID EXTRAVAGANZA IS ONE OF MY FAVORITES. IT'S LIKE STEPPING INTO A SPA WITH THE MOST DELIGHTFUL AROMAS OF SPRING FLOWERS AND MUCH NEEDED WARM HUMIDIFIED AIR AFTER A VERY COLD FEW WEEKS OF WINTER. WE HAD SO MUCH FUN WATCHING KIRA RUN AROUND AND ENJOY MOSTLY THE WATER FOUNTAINS. THE LIGHTING WAS BEAUTIFUL INSIDE AND I COULD CAPTURE HER BIG BRIGHT EYES AT ANY TIME.

WHAT A GREAT DAY FOR AN OUTING AND CAPTURING SOME AMAZING PHOTOS OF MY AMAZING CHILD.

OH HOW I LOVE YOU SWEET KIRA!

Happy Valentine's Day

2010-02-14T04:25:00.001-08:00

MAY YOUR HEART BE FILLED WITH THE GREAT LOVE THAT WARMS MINE EVERY SINGLE DAY!

How to act like a real Princess

2010-02-10T10:16:00.000-08:00

MY LITTLE TOT JUST LOVES DRESSING UP LIKE A PRINCESS...EVERY DAY THAT IS! YEP, WHO NEEDS TO SHOP NOW WHEN ALL SHE WANTS TO WEAR IS HER PRINCESS OUTFITS. I SO ENJOY WATCHING HER AND STILL WONDER WHEN SHE DEVELOPED THE FASCINATION OF DRESS UP. DORA HANGS OUT IN SHORTS, ELMO IN RED FUR AND THE KAI LAN ALSO IN SUMMER GARB. PERHAPS SHE IS EMULATING ME:))

YOU DEFINITELY NEED THE SMILE AND NECKLACE.

THEN A MUST IS THE ATTITUDE!

HOWEVER, EVERY PRINCESS HAS TO WEAR LIPSTICK (SHE DOES A PRETTY GOOD JOB AT PUTTING IT ON TOO).

NOW OF COURSE YOU PURSE THOSE LIPS AND MAKE SURE THE COVERAGE IS EVEN!

"Children put a twinkle in your eye and a smile in your heart" Author Unknown

Talking!

2010-01-29T21:38:00.000-08:00

ANOTHER SLEEPLESS NIGHT, NOT SURE IF IT'S MY HEAD COLD OR TOO MUCH CAFFEINE, BUT THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A GOOD TIME TO CATCH UP ON MY POSTS.

YES, IT'S BEEN WAY TOO LONG AND I'VE MISSED DOCUMENTING MILESTONES AND SHARING STORIES. GUESS FACEBOOK HAS MONOPOLIZED THE LITTLE BIT OF SPARE TIME I DO HAVE. YEP, I'LL ADMIT I'M A PROUD FARMER IN FARMVILLE NOW, RAISING COWS AND CHICKENS AND HARVESTING MY CROPS. MINDLESS, YES, THERAPEUTIC...MAYBE!

OKAY SO WHAT IS MY TINY TOT UP TO THESE DAYS, HMMM. SHE CAN FINALLY OUT TALK ME! Now for those that know me it's quite an accomplishment to do that:)) she talks up a storm and it's very entertaining to hear my daughter try to talk just like me!

JUST A FEW OF MY FAVORITE SAYINGS:

-MOMMY, I CAN'T LIKE THAT (rather than I don't) LOL
-STOP A TALKIN TO ME!
-I'M SO TIRED (gee where did she learn that)?
-Calls her Zhu Zhu "little Buddy".
-LOVES THE MOVIES MONSTER'S INC. AND BOLT! She thinks the green one eyed monster is an M&M and engages me in convo regarding the fact that he only has one eye and no nose!
- ENJOYS DRESSING UP, TAKING CLOTHES OFF IN THE FRIGID WEATHER AND PUTTING HER "SNOW WIPE" DRESS ON. YES SHE IS SNOW WIPE, WIPING EVERYTHING OFF THE FLOOR WITH THAT COSTUME THAT IS TOO BIG FOR HER, BUT OH HOW CUTE!

-ADORES TALKING ON THE PHONE AND YES SHE KNOWS WHO SHE IS TALKING TO.

I OFTEN FIND MYSELF BREAKING OUT IN SONG TO THE WONDER PETS THEME OR THE BACKYARDIGANS AND KIRA SAYS EMPHATICALLY, "MOMMY, STOP MAKING NOISE" or recently "STOP SINGIN". WELL I HAVE TO AGREE WITH HER ON THIS, I HAVE NO TONAL VOICE RANGE.

-MY DAUGHTER IS DEFINITELY A MOMMA'S GIRL AND A LITTLE SNUGGLE BUG. OH HOW I LOVE HER AFFECTION. EVERY NIGHT, AFTER SHE FALLS ASLEEP, I PLACE A GENTLE KISS ON HER HEAD AND JUST STARE DOWN AT THIS CHILD, STILL AMAZED THAT SHE'S MY DAUGHTER. SUCH A BEAUTIFUL BOND AND LOVE THAT I'M SO GRATEFUL FOR AND ONE THAT I ABSOLUTELY CHERISH.

-SHE'S CERTAINLY A TODDLER BECAUSE EVERYTHING IS HERS!

I MUST LAUGH BECAUSE THIS IS A UNIVERSAL CONCEPT IN TODDLERHOOD, NOW TRYING TO INTRODUCE THE CONCEPT OF SHARING.

-OUT OF THE BITING PHASE AND OH SO POLITE STAGE! So cute to hear her say please and thank you and it was so easy to teach, go figure. Maybe potty training will be this easy:))

-I WUV YOU MOMMY! PURE MUSIC TO MY EARS.

I WUV YOU TOO BABY GIRL!

Happy 3rd Birthday!

2010-01-22T17:08:00.000-08:00

STUDYING HER TINKER BELL TOY

OH SHE'S MY DAUGHTER ALRIGHT, STARTING OUT THE DAY WITH A LARGE CUP OF JAVA!

NOW WIDE EYED AND AWAKE FROM THE CAFFEINE JOLT (CHECK OUT THOSE EYES) WE WENT TO TAKE SOME PHOTOS! KIRA LOVES FOR ME TO TAKE PHOTOS OF HER, BUT ONLY WHEN SHE WANTS THEM DONE!

CAN'T DECIDE WHICH ONE IS MY FAVORITE! SHE HAS THE BEST EXPRESSIONS, BUT THIS IS DELIGHTFUL, LOVE THAT DIMPLE THERE BABY!

TRYING TO GET OUT OF POSING BUT AFTER A FEW BRIBES SHE CONTINUED ON.

NOW IT WAS MY TURN TO BE ENTERTAINED. YEP, SHE WAS WORKING ME ALRIGHT, BUT LOVED EVERY MINUTE OF IT.

ON JANUARY 20TH WE CELEBRATED KIRA'S THIRD BIRTHDAY! I HAVE BEEN DELAYING WRITING THIS OR I SHOULD SAY DIDN'T QUITE KNOW WHAT OR HOW TO WRITE ABOUT IT UNTIL NOW. KIRA SHARES THE SAME BIRTHDAY AS MY MOTHER, SO I WAS SO SAD WHEN I WENT TO BUY KIRA A CARD AND SAW ALL THE MOTHER'S BIRTHDAY CARDS THERE TOO. IT JUST HIT ME THERE IN THAT HALLMARK STORE THAT I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO SEND MY MOM ANOTHER CARD OR EVEN GET ONE OF HER SPECIAL CARDS WITH HER HAND WRITTEN SENTIMENTS IN IT. I DROPPED TO MY KNEES AND CRIED, RIGHT THERE IN THE STORE. I PRETENDED LIKE I WAS LOOKING AT SOMETHING ON THE VERY BOTTOM THERE, SO NO ONE WOULD CALL OUT THE LOONY TRUCK, BUT I SOBBED ALL THE WAY HOME.

HOW FAST SHE HAS GROWN, SEEMS LIKE JUST A FEW MONTHS AGO WHEN WE WERE STILL CONCERNED ABOUT HER ABILITY TO COMMUNICATE CLEARLY, YET NOW SHE'S SPEAKING LIKE EVERY OTHER 3 YR OLD. IN FACT KIRA WAS RECENTLY EVALUATED FOR THE 3RD TIME BY A PRIVATE SPEECH THERAPY CLINICIAN WHO WAS AMAZED AT HER COGNITIVE, RECEPTIVE AND VERBAL SKILLS. WE'RE THRILLED SHE DOESNT' NEED SPEECH THERAPY AT THIS TIME.

NOW I LOOK AT THIS BEAUTIFUL CHILD AND THINK HOW FAR SHE HAS COME, HOW MUCH LOVE AND JOY AND MOTIVATION SHE BRINGS ME EVERY DAY.

A VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR KIRA, OUR DAUGHTER, MY INSPIRATION!

Two Years ago today I became a Mommy!

2010-01-07T05:18:00.000-08:00

HUNAN, CHINA 2008

I HONESTLY CAN NOT BELIEVE THAT IT HAS BEEN EXACTLY TWO YEARS WHEN WE TRAVELED HALF WAY AROUND THE WORLD TO MEET A TINY BABY NAMED MENG. BY THE NEXT DAY WE OFFICIALLY HAD ADOPTED HER IN THE PEOPLE'S REPUBLIC OF CHINA AND NAMED HER KIRA ISABELLA. IT TRULY WAS AN AMAZING JOURNEY THAT I WILL NEVER FORGET!

IT WAS THE END OF A WORK DAY FOR ME IN THE CARDIAC CATH LAB AND MY HUSBAND CALLED AROUND 5PM TELLING ME "YOU JUST BECAME A MOM", I GASPED, RAN OUT INTO THE HALLS (WHERE MY CO-WORKERS WERE) AND SCREAMED "I AM A MOM!" THEY ALL THOUGHT I WAS OUT OF MY HEAD, AFTER ALL NO ONE KNEW ABOUT THE ADOPTION AND THEY ALL THOUGHT MY DOG HAD PUPPIES! I THINK MANY WERE SURPRISED. ACTUALLY I HAD NO IDEA WE WOULD GET A MATCH AFTER WAITING OVER A YEAR AND THOUGHT IT WOULD BE AT LEAST ANOTHER 6 MONTHS TO ANOTHER YEAR, BUT WE CHOSE TO ADOPT THROUGH OUR AGENCY'S CHILD OF PROMISE OPTION AND THIS TINY INFANT NEEDED A CLEFT LIP AND PALATE REPAIR.

AS WEEKS WENT BY, I KEPT GOING OVER THE DETAILS, MAKING SURE ALL THE PAPERWORK WAS IN ORDER, VISAS, ETC. TO THOSE WHO KNOW ME WELL, THAT WAS A FEAT IN ITSELF BECAUSE I AM NOT THE MOST ORGANIZED PERSON IN THE WORLD AND IN FACT, I WAS LATE FOR MY OWN WEDDING! BUT IN JANUARY 6, 2008 I WAS UBER ORGANIZED AND EARLY.

THE MONTHS PRECEDING THE ADOPTION WERE FULL OF EXCITEMENT AND ANTICIPATION. WHILE IT WAS THE FIRST TIME FOR ME OVERSEAS, I JUST COULDN'T GET TO CHANGSHA FAST ENOUGH. MY HEART WAS IN LOVE WITH A PICTURE WE RECEIVED IN LATE OCTOBER AND AT THAT TIME SHE WAS ONLY 5 MONTHS OLD. I STARTED TO WORRY LIKE ANY EXPECTANT MOMMA, HOPING SHE WOULD BE OKAY AND NOT FALL OUT OF HER CRIB OR WONDER WHETHER SHE WAS BEING HELD IF SHE CRIED OR IF SHE WAS STANDING, WALKING. WHAT WORDS WAS SHE SAYING? SO MANY QUESTIONS THAT WE REALLY NEVER HAD ANSWERS TO UNTIL WE SAW HER AND THEN THE MONTHS OF WAITING AND HUNDREDS OF QUESTIONS JUST FADED AWAY AS MY EYES WERE FIXED ON THIS LITTLE GIRL, BUNDLED IN FOUR LAYERS OF CLOTHES AND SMILING AS WE APPROACHED. SHE COULD STAND WITH HELP, BUT WASN'T WALKING YET. SHE HAD TWO TEETH AND A SOFT VOICE. HER FEATURES WERE PETITE AND DAINTY, SHE WAS SIMPLY THE MOST BEAUTIFUL CHILD I HAD EVER SEEN AND I WAS INSTANTLY IN LOVE! MY HEART WAS BEATING FAST BUT SO WAS HERS, MY EYES WERE FULL OF TEARS; AND SO WERE HERS. I HELD HER TIGHT BUT SHE WANTED NOTHING TO DO WITH ME AND KEPT LOOKING AND REACHING FOR HER CARETAKERS. I TRIED TO COMFORT HER, BUT SHE SCREAMED EVEN LOUDER. IN FACT SHE CRIED FOR HOURS TILL WE GOT BACK TO THE HOTEL AND I PUT IN A CHINESE LULLABY CD AND SHE LISTENED INTENTLY TO IT. IN FACT SHE STOPPED CRYING AND STARTED TO LOOK AROUND AT HER NEW WORLD. FROM THAT DAY FORWARD, ALL HER NEW EXPERIENCES WERE ALSO MINE!

THIS CHILD, MY DAUGHTER HAD GIVEN ME SUCH AN INCREDIBLE GIFT, THE GIFT OF MOTHERHOOD.

I WILL ALWAYS BE GRATEFUL FOR THOSE WHO HELPED, INSPIRED AND KEPT MY DREAM ALIVE!

YOU ARE SO LOVED MY DEAR CHILD. I HOPE YOU WILL ALWAYS KNOW THAT!

LOVE,

MOMMA

A trip to Disney

2010-01-03T13:54:00.001-08:00

NOW FASCINATED BY FACIAL MAKE UP FROM MY CHANEL COLLECTION, SHE EASILY WAS PERSUADED TO SIT FOR A WHILE AND HAVE HER FACE MADE UP, EVERY OTHER DAY.
THESE TWO SISTERS ARE JUST AS PRECIOUS AND LOVING AS I KNEW THEY WOULD BE. ELLIANA HAS THE CUTEST LAUGH AND SO LOOKS UP TO HER BIG SISTER BELLE. AND SWEET ISABELLA HAS A HUGE HEART AND PATIENCE EXPLAINING TO KIRA ALL SHE NEEDED TO KNOW ABOUT DISNEY. I JUST LOVED HOW ISABELLA LEAPED INTO MY ARMS WHILE WE WAITED FOR DINNER ONE NIGHT. I ADORE THESE CHILDREN AND THEIR ENTIRE FAMILY!

EPCOT OR MAGIC KINGDOM? ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS LET THE PARENTAL UNITS KNOW! KIRA LOVED RIDING IN THE DOUBLE STROLLER WITH HER NEW PAL AND ISABELLA LOVED STROLLING WITH US.
FIRST SECURITY CHECK! IT'S ONLY DIAPERS LADY! LOOKING COOL RIDING HER MICKEY BUS.
PRETTY ISABELLA ACTING SILLY THE DAY WE MET.
CHECK OUT MY NEW SHADES!
PEEK A BOO!
DANCING IN THE STREETS

MESMERIZED BY TINKER BELL
AS YOU CAN SEE, KIRA LOVED CINDERELLA AND TALKED ABOUT HER FOR DAYS.

SHE'S BEEN WEARING THAT DRESS TO BED EVERY NIGHT AND THE BOTTOM IS SHREDDED!
DADDY BRIBING KIRA WITH A JELLY BEAN TO GO ON ONE MORE RIDE WITH HIM!

Playing Catch Up

2010-01-03T07:54:00.000-08:00

This week we will celebrate two years since the day we met and held our daughter for the first time. I find it so hard to believe that so much time has already gone by, however when I look at this child I see her changing every day. She is so curious and loving and still struggles a bit with speech issues. She has a great sense of humor and loves to get messy! She's a girly girl alright! One day she walked over to me with smeared red lipstick all over her face and make up foundation on her clothes. Well, I tried so hard to not laugh and just told her how pretty she looked! She continues to insist that I put make up and lipstick on her, but doesn't realize that I can't afford my Channel facial products anymore so I substitute chapstick:))

Last month we finally took her to Disney and met up with my dearest friend Natalie and her family. Natalie and I have known one another before the adoption of her second daughter and it was pure joy to finally meet in person. What an amazingly wonderful lady, mother and friend. Our girls just clicked and became immediate friends and it truly was a magical time there. I'll be posting those pics later. Guess I have a lot to catch up on.

In the meantime, my blogging has been seriously slacking. Honestly I've not had the energy to write, then think that I owe it to Kira to keep this going as a keepsake for her. I've been trying hard to get my new business SIMPLY CANDID PHOTOGRAPHY promoted and indeed December proved to be a busy month for holiday family shoots. I was thrilled, as I got to meet some great clients and it kept my mind occupied (well sometimes).

It's still a novelty to hear myself say "my daughter" or to hear her call me "Mommy". During the last few months, I clung to Kira, needing her more than ever as I tried so hard to figure out how to cope without my mother. I would look down at Kira and tell her the same stories my mom would tell me and then I realized how good it felt to remember those stories, the tenderness of my mothers' touch and her sweet voice. I still struggle through the days and nights, but realize how happy my mother was that I had Kira in my life. So I hold onto precious memories now and try to create new ones for sweet Kira.

So here's a little glimpse of the past few months.

Back to Basics

2009-10-19T05:17:00.000-07:00

OKAY, I KNOW THIS TITLE IS A CHRISTINA AQUILERA SONG, BUT OVER THE PAST FEW MONTHS THAT'S BASICALLY WHAT I HAVE BEEN DOING...GETTING BACK TO THE BASICS SO THAT I CAN SORT OF GET BACK ON TRACK. BLOGGING HAS TAKEN A BACK SEAT THESE DAYS TO OTHER EVENTS, BUT HAVING LOOKED BACK AT PREVIOUS POSTS I REALIZED THIS BLOG HAS ALLOWED ME TO MAKE SOME AMAZING FRIENDS AND BRAG ABOUT MY BEAUTIFUL GIRL. SO HAVING SAID THAT, I'M GOING TO TRY AND GET BACK IN THE LOOP.

SO WHAT IS KIRA UP TO AT 32 MONTHS OF AGE

TALKING UP A STORM. NOW SPEAKING 6-8 WORD SENTENCES AND I'M SO HAPPY!
CLIMBING AND JUMPING
RIDING HER TRIKE (IN THE HOUSE, BECAUSE MOMMY CAN'T RUN AS FAST AS SHE CAN PEDDLE THAT BIKE).
BOSSING HER DOG AROUND.
ROLE PLAYING WITH ELMO, MAX AND RUBY.
MAKING NEW FRIENDS IN PRE-SCHOOL AND LEARNING TO CLEAN UP!
CAN DRESS AND SOMETIMES COORDINATE HER OUTFITS.
COUNTS TO 12 AND KNOWS ALL HER ALPHABETS.
CAN PUT TOGETHER 12 PIECE PUZZLE WITHOUT HELP.
THINKS HER KITCHEN IS A REAL KITCHEN AND SO I FIND ALL KINDS OF STUFF IN IT!
NOW ANSWERS THE REAL PHONE AND CONVERSES WITH MY FRIENDS!
SHE CRAYONS ON THE BIG SCREEN TV AND ALSO WASHES IT OFF.
CAN THROW A BALL LIKE COLE HAMMEL (GO PHILLIES)!
SHE LOVES TO DANCE AND REALLY HAS SOME RHYTHM.
LOVES GIRLY THINGS (PURSES, SHOES, DRESSES).
ENJOYS PLAYING WITH HER FRIENDS AND ASKS FOR SARAH ALL THE TIME!
READS BOOKS TO HER DOG AND ELMO BABIES.

SHE IS A SHEER DELIGHT AND CAN OUT TALK ME:))

OCCASIONALLY SHE WILL HAM IT UP FOR THE CAMERA SO HERE'S SOME OF MY FAVORITE OVER THE PAST FEW WEEKS.

A step at a time

2009-09-16T15:54:00.000-07:00

MY DEAR FRIENDS AND FOLLOWERS, A HUGE THANK YOU FOR ALL THE KIND WORDS OF COMFORT AND SUPPORT. I'VE GOT CARDS FROM PEOPLE I NEVER MET AND THEN THOSE I AM SO CLOSE TO. I AM SO AMAZED AT THE OUTPOURING OF LOVE FOR MY FAMILY AND I, AND MOST IMPORTANTLY VERY GRATEFUL.

IT'S STILL SO DIFFICULT FOR ME TO GET THROUGH THE DAYS WITHOUT SPEAKING TO MY MOM. TODAY, KIRA REACHED FOR HER PHOTO AND SAID "MOM MOM IS IN MY HEART" AND PUT HER HAND ON HER CHEST. I BURST OUT IN TEARS OBVIOUSLY, BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TELLING HER. THEN SHE PROCEEDED TO GENTLY KISS THE PHOTO AND HAND IT BACK TO ME. I GUESS SHE SENSES MY PAIN, I JUST HOPE SHE DOESN'T HEAR ME CRYING LATE AT NIGHT.

MY DAYS ARE FULL OF PLAY WITH MY DAUGHTER, BUT MY NIGHTS REMAIN PENSIVE.

I HOPE TO CATCH UP ON THIS BLOG HERE SOON. I HAVE SOME GREAT PHOTOS THAT NEED TO BE HERE AND ALSO WHEN I LOOK BACK AT THIS BLOG, I REMEMBER IT WAS AROUND THIS TIME WHEN I GOT MY NEW "MAKEOVER" BLOG. I MISS BLOGGING AND MAKING NEW FRIENDS AND WANT TO POST SOON.

THANK YOU ALL AGAIN FOR SHOWING YOUR CONCERN AND HELPING ME TO SOMEHOW HEAL AND GET THROUGH THIS.

A Mother's Love

2009-08-27T20:21:00.000-07:00

I HAVE BEEN UNABLE TO BLOG OF LATE, MOSTLY BECAUSE I WAS SO FOCUSED ON MY PHOTOGRAPHY, NOW I THINK THAT WAS LOST TIME AS CURRENTLY I MUST DEAL WITH A FAMILY TRAGEDY.

USUALLY I AM GIFTED WITH WORDS OF COMFORT WHEN IT COMES TO OTHERS I CARE ABOUT, BUT THIS TIME I AM COMPLETELY LOST. LOST AND LONELY, ISOLATED AND SCARED, ANXIOUS AND ANGRY, BECAUSE THE WOMAN WHO BROUGHT ME INTO THIS WORLD, SUDDENLY LEFT, LEAVING ME WITH ALL THESE EMOTIONS I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO DEAL WITH.

I FIND MYSELF RE-VISITING MY PAST, HOPING THAT WHEN I DREAM, I FIND MY MOTHER STANDING NEXT TO ME SMILING AND TELLING ME EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OKAY. THEN I AWAKE AND THIS SINKING FEELING HITS ME THAT I'LL NEVER SEE HER BEAUTIFUL SMILING FACE AGAIN.

SO NOW I THINK ABOUT MY MOTHER'S LEGACY TO ME, THE GIFT OF LOVE THAT TRANSCENDS DECADES, EVOLVING INTO A BOND THAT GROWS STRONGER THROUGH YEARS AND IS NEVER BROKEN. IT IS SECURITY, ADVICE AND STRENGTH TO MOVE FORWARD WHEN YOU THINK YOU CAN'T, IT IS JOY, CONTENTMENT AND WARMTH ON A BRISK FALL DAY. BUT MOST OF ALL, THIS LOVE, IS ABOUT A MOTHER AND HER DAUGHTER, WHO NOW GRACIOUSLY WILL CARRY ON A LEGACY OF HER LIFE STORIES.

WHILE I DEBATED WRITING ANYTHING ABOUT MY LOSS, I REALIZED THAT THIS BLOG IS ABOUT OUR LIVES AND CERTAINLY MY MOTHER WAS A VERY IMPORTANT FIGURE IN MY DAUGHTER'S LIFE. I JUST HOPE I CAN BE HALF THE MOTHER TO KIRA THAT MY DEAR MOTHER WAS TO ME.

MOM,
I'LL LOVE YOU FOREVER!

A Day at the Beach

2009-07-13T23:05:00.000-07:00

Kira had so much fun running and jumping around on the beach. It was nearly impossible to get her to sit still, but that was the fun part! Watching her put her feet in the water for the first time brought back so many memories for some reason. I guess the "shore" will always be my home away from home since I practically grew up there.

These photos were taken along a NJ shoreline if you can believe it. Lightroom works wonders for muddy water:)) The first photo is my favorite because I caught that great look she occasionally gives me. These were all taken with natural light around 5pm with my 50mm lens. It was definitely fun to get to the beach, finally...if only to take a few photos!

Happy 4th of July

2009-07-07T13:57:00.001-07:00

A Bit of Sass and Silliness

2009-06-28T12:25:00.000-07:00

I LOVE THIS FACE!

I SAID MOVE OVER!

YOU GO FIRST DOG!

AWH, HER BEST FRIEND! THE BIG DOG WITH A BIG KISS FOR KIRA

I'VE FALLEN AND CAN'T GET OUT !

FIRST INTRODUCTION TO TREE CLIMBING AND AWAY SHE GOES!

YOU WANT ME TO COME DOWN! WELL COME AND GET ME MOMMY!

I LOVE THE WAY THE TREE SEEMS TO BE THE FRAME IN THIS PHOTO. SOMETHING CAUGHT HER EYE, PROBABLY AN ANT!

IT'S BEEN PRETTY RAINY THIS MONTH SO THESE PHOTOS WERE TAKEN A FEW WEEKS AGO. I CAN'T COMPLAIN ABOUT THE RAIN, IT JUST MAKES THE GARDENS AND GRASS GREENER FOR A LONGER TIME, BUT IT DOES MAKE FOR SOME INTERESTING ENTERTAINMENT FOR A 2 YEAR OLD.

KIRA'S LANGUAGE ACQUISITION HAS STEADILY IMPROVED. NOW SHE'S SAYING SENTENCES, YELLING AT THE DOG, ASKING FOR THINGS AND REFERRING TO HERSELF AS "ME" OR "KEE". SHE LOVES HER DOG RECCHI, BUT LOVES BOSING HIM AROUND MORE (AS YOU CAN SEE).

I FOUND HER SINGING THE THEME SONG TO "ELMO'S WORLD" AND SILENTLY LAUGHED AT SHE DELIGHTFULLY AND PROUDLY BELTED OUT THAT TUNE!

POTTY TRAINING IS ON THE BACK BURNER FOR SOME REASON, BUT HEY, SHE'S BUSY LEARNING TO SPEAK, CLIMB AND RECENTLY COUNT TO 9. SHE'S ALSO ENGAGES IN PLAYING MOMMY TO ELMO AND HER STUFFED KITTY AND WRAPS THEM UP IN TOWELS AND PLACES THEM IN HER BED TO SLEEP.

SHE'D RATHER BE OUTSIDE ALL THE TIME AND LOVES WATCHING THE BUNNIES HOP ACROSS THE GRASS.

TRULY GROWING BY LEAPS AND BOUNDS, I AM TRYING TO CAPTURE SOME OF HER PERSONALITY WHICH DEFINITELY IS A COMBINATION OF SASS AND SILLINESS.

I AM SO PROUD OF THIS CHILD, WHO CONTINUES TO BE SUCH A SWEET AND SENSITIVE LITTLE GIRL THAT CONTINUES TO CAPTIVATE THE ATTENTION OF HER ADORING FAMILY.

Birthday Fun

2009-06-11T20:12:00.000-07:00

PRECIOUS BABY

HANDSOME NICK

NICK TEACHING THE GIRLS HOW TO DRINK FROM A FOUNTAIN (NOTICE SARAH'S MAKING THE EFFORT)!

AFTER SEEING HER BIG BROTHER GULPING WATER, SARAH GIVES IT A TRY! I LAUGHED SO HARD WHEN I SAW HER EXPRESSIONS...SIMPLY PRICELESS. NICK WAS OFF TO THE SIDE STARTING AND STOPPING THE WATER AT HIS SISTERS EXPENSE, BUT SHE WAS DETERMINED TO GET A DRINK IN THE HEAT OF THE DAY!

TWO BABES PLAYING WITH THE FOUNTAIN AND HAVING SOME GOOD OLD FASHION FUN!

THESE TWO RAN AROUND AND AROUND AND AROUND...AND AROUND!

"GOTCHA", NO I GOT YOU!"

SARAH, I THINK YOU DROPPED THIS! SARAH'S LOOK SAYS' IT ALL, NO WAY, THAT'S NOT MINE!

WELL, I CAN'T THINK OF A BETTER WAY TO SPEND MY BIRTHDAY THEN WITH MY DAUGHTER AND DEAR FRIEND LISA AND HER TWO CHILDREN.

KIRA ALREADY HAS A CRUSH ON NICK (OR NICKNE AS SHE CALLS HIM) AND SARAH WAS JUST AS FUNNY AS EVER WITH HER ANIMATED EXPRESSIONS. WE TOOK THE KIDS TO THE PARK TO GET SOME PHOTOS, BUT IT SEEMS THEY WOULD RATHER PLAY AND PLAY HARD THEY DID!

I THINK WE NEEDED ONE OF THOSE HIGH POWERED SPORTS PHOTOG LENS TO CAPTURE THE ACTION. BUT THESE WERE THE HIGHLIGHTS OF SOME VERY FUNNY PHOTOS!

A Trip to the Gardens

2009-06-08T06:39:00.000-07:00

SHE'S ALL I NEED FOR MY BIRTHDAY!

PROBABLY BY NOW EVERYONE KNOWS HOW CRAZY I AM FOR FLOWERS AND GARDENS. I'VE ALWAYS LOVED TO GARDEN AND WONDERED IF SOMEDAY I WOULD HAVE MY OWN GREENHOUSE. HOWEVER, WITH LONGWOOD GARDENS ABOUT AN HOUR FROM OUR HOUSE, FORGET MY OWN, THIS PLACE IS SO THERAPEUTIC FOR THE MIND AND SENSES. EVEN THE BABE ENJOYS FREELY RUNNING AROUND. I HAD TO GET SEASON PASSES AND NOW THERE'S NO EXCUSE TO NOT GO! THERE'S ACRES AND ACRES OF EVERY PLANT AND THEN GREENHOUSES FULL OF MORE! I'LL BE POSTING SOME OF MY FLOWERS SHOTS ON MY OTHER PHOTO BLOG. BUT HERE'S SOME CUTE PHOTOS OF KIRA HAVING FUN. AFTER A WEEK OF RAIN, IT WAS GREAT TO GET OUT!

DETERMINED TO GET THAT DRINK OF WATER (EVEN THOUGH I HAD IT WITH ME)

HEY PARENTAL UNITS! I'M COMING, I'M COMING.

SWEET BABY GIRL.

OH THIS PLACE IS NICE. OKAY YOU CAN TAKE A PIC OF ME HERE:))

It's June Already

2009-06-05T14:05:00.001-07:00

Where does the time go? I honestly can't believe it's June and the next thing you know it will be August, September and back to the hustle and bustle of getting ready for the holidays! Oh well, guess being a Mom has been keeping me busier than I thought, in addition to my new addiction of photography! Yes I am completely glued to flickr these days and learning new ways to process my photos. However, the sweetest photos are the ones I take of my Kira, saying "no Mommy" as she pushes me over.

My little bug has grown these past few months...talking, climbing and in her own way "arguing" that it's not time to go to bed yet (there's just so much to explore in one day)! I have to say I find her pretty entertaining these days as she is repeating almost everything she hears or what I ask her to say. Some words are quite clear and others are cute Kira talk.

I love when she says Mommy! Now that's very clear instead of Maaaaah

She wants me to put lipstick on her when she sees me putting it on and the other day I saw her take deodorant and rub it under her arms, laughing to myself that she truly does mimick what she sees. Elmo is still her home boy, but she's slowly acclimating to DadadaDora! Thank goodness, new DVD's to buy and listen to. However I can't knock elmo completely, those DVD's have taught her shapes, colors and how to count to 10. She loves to sing her ABC's, Old McDonald and The Itsy Bitsy Spidey (as she affectionately refers to it). She can ask for her little friends by their names, Maddie, Sarah and Tori and is as excited to see them as I am my friends (their Mommy's). Yes, my baby girl is growing up and it's happening right before my eyes. If it weren't for my photography, I wouldn't realize the changes. She's taller, more muscular and definitely stronger. Her facial features are more more pronounced, but there's still just a small scar over the right side of her upper lip from the repair done while she was only 5 months old. She remains so engaging and happy and so enjoys being in the company of family and friends.

Okay, so this is another post where I am bragging, but I can't help it. She's my daughter and I still love saying repeating that!

So as the days of June go by, I will try even harder to make the summer days linger as I watch my daughter explore, learn and love the world around her.

Thankful

2009-05-14T11:31:00.001-07:00

DEAR SWEET KIRA,

HAVE I TOLD YOU HOW MUCH YOU MAKE ME SMILE EACH AND EVERY DAY?

IF I HAVE NEGLECTED TO, WELL, YOU DO!

HAVE I PLANTED ENOUGH KISSES ON YOUR FACE TODAY?

IF NOT, I WILL MAKE SURE THAT I PLANT AN EXTRA FEW!

HAVE I WHISPERED IN YOUR EAR TODAY THAT I AM THANKFUL YOU ARE A PART OF MY LIFE?

IF NOT, LET ME TELL YOU THAT I AM VERY THANKFUL AND WILL ALWAYS BE SO. YOU ARE MY WORLD!

Tuesday's Thoughts

2009-05-12T08:57:00.000-07:00

It's been a wild and crazy past few weeks and I have slacking here on my blog. But during the past few weeks I have seen some amazing changes in my little girl. She is incredibly independent, verbal and almost potty trained. She finally says "MOMMY" (instead of MAA, like blah), and has become so much more interactive with other children. I love to hear her giggles and babbling and bought a camera to capture these tender moments. When ever I figure out how to upload a clip I will be sure to post it.
She always amazes me with something new. For example, I was driving home from the store and instead of humming some country ballad to myself, I burst out with the ABC song. With the radio still on, I heard Kira say "L M N O P" AND ALMOST hit the brakes! At first I thought I was hearing things and turned off the radio, started over and she repeated it again. Oh my goodness, where have I been when she started learning the alphabet song? It was a very cute moment and she now still sings it with missing letters and her interpretation of the song (which somehow includes elmo). She also does the Itsy Bitsy Spider in her car seat and I just crack up, especially since I've not really acted out that song with her in a long time. But some how she remembers and sings outloud!

Okay, so I am THRILLED and yes bragging a bit! But isn't that the innate right of a Mom. Guess it's more special since clefting was assumed to affect her speech. But with words like tropical bird, giraffe, lion, baby and so many others, clearly she's determined to speak and hasn't displayed any speech issues for her age. I am so glad because some of her sleep issues and tantrums have also resolved with her ability to communicate more effectively. I now look back and think, you know, I would be pulling my hair, scratching and hitting myself too if no one could understand me.

So for the next few weeks I'll be paying more attention to my precious daughter so I don't miss her discovering new words or songs. I know she has an affinity for music and can even tap out a beat on her little legs, too funny!

Thinking of a Mother across the world

2009-05-09T04:55:00.000-07:00

Without giving away my, unhmmm age here, let's just say many years ago the hopes and dreams of becoming a biological Mommy were dashed when I was quite young. I spent the majority of my adult life trying to find answers and "replacements" for the void I had in my heart. I've had few regrets along the way, one involving a previous relationship and the other not adopting sooner!!! This post is still very difficult to write and talk about (goodness knows I'm never at a loss for words).

However, sixteen months ago I did become a Mommy, to the most amazing little girl in the world, my daughter Kira! No one could ever convince me that she didn't come from my womb because of the immense love I have for this child. I never thought it was possible to love so deeply, unconditionally and without conviction, until this child entered my life. It is an amazing feeling, one that I am sure any mother biological or adoptive could appreciate and I am so glad that I can thank the PRC and Holt International for making my dream of motherhood, reality.

However, there is also another very important person who I will always think about, not just on Mother's Day, but sometimes all through the year. That person is Kira's biological mother, who resides half a world away. I often hope that she knows how loved her daughter is and that she did find her way into our forever family. I also hope that she is somehow at peace with herself for having to relinquish her tiny newborn. I know that this woman loved Kira as she kept her for two months before leaving her to be found in Hunan. It was due to Kira's clefting issue that we believe led to her abandonment, since surgery and follow up care is so expensive there. It breaks my heart, but at the same time I know she did the right thing, for her baby's sake.

So today, I am not thinking of myself, I am thinking of Kira's birth mother.

Rain Rain go away!

2009-05-08T04:39:00.000-07:00

A sunny Spring Day! Amazing, the rain has finally subsided, at least for a while anyway. Even Kira has been saying "outside" Mommy. I think it's kind of cute that she asks to go outside because one of the first things that I recall from her social evaluation in You Xian was being fond of the outdoors. And so she is, just like me:))

The past few days we've been playing and watching the flowers start to peek out of my little garden. The grass is so green and the remnants of a cold winter are now long forgotten. I almost can't believe that it's Spring, but every where you look there's pretty reminders.

I have neglected my blog and for good reasons. My sweet daughter usually must have most of my attention, which makes it difficult to blog and keep up. In addition, I am pursuing my love for photography and have been practicing diligently, which I find is quite time consuming. Howver, it's so worth it and I can't wait to capture more photos of Kira. Currently, she runs from the camera or turns her head and who could blame her:)) My good lens requires that I get right up in her face and I guess I would be put out too. Give her a ball, elmo and a few skittles though and I think she'll cooperate. Now I need an assistant to direct the light (as I now know from the Pixel Fairy Princess Workshop).

Mom me

2009-04-16T04:55:00.000-07:00

This week I chose this photo to follow along with the theme Daughters, from We Picture {This}. She's not the biggest fan of the camera which is almost daily in her face, so it's hard to get smiles. However I did get catch light in those baby brown eyes! I just love my baby more than I can explain. This child's personality and sweetness just grows every day! SHE IS MY DAUGHTER, the child I dreamed of my entire life, the little girl who has captured my heart and for that I am thankful, every single day!

OVER THE LAST WEEK I HAVE NOTICED AN INCREDIBLE INCREASE IN KIRA'S VOCABULARY, NOW USING 2 AND 3 WORD SENTENCES. AFTER OUR SPEECH CONSULTATION I WAS GIVEN A LIST OF THINGS TO PRACTICE TO HELP KIRA'S SPEECH. SO DOESN'T IT FIGURE I TRIED A FEW THINGS AND SHE'S PRACTICALLY GIVING SPEECHES!

HERE'S MY FAVORITE STORY OF WHAT THE TITLE "MOMMY" MEANS TO MY DAUGHTER.

ONE OF HER FIRST NEW WORDS IS "ME", WHICH IS GREAT BECAUSE SHE NOW REFERS TO HERSELF INSTEAD OF ELMO!

SO WHEN SHE WANTS TO GET MY ATTENTION SHE YELLS "MOM" "ME". I JUST LAUGH TO MYSELF THINKING HOW SMART SHE IS AND HOW STUPID I FEEL. THE FIRST TIME I HEARD IT I THOUGHT, GREAT SHE'S NOW CALLING ME MOMMY, AND THINKING HOW DO THEY LEARN THAT IN JUST ONE DAY? WELL, I WILL HAVE TO CHECK ON THE WEBSTERS VERSION, BUT I THINK KIDS CREATED "MOMMY" MEANING "MOM" "ME".

OTHER WORDS:

PURPLE BALLOON
COOKIE
BYE BYE BALLOON (WHEN I LET GO AND IT FLEW UP AND AWAY) OH DID I HAVE A LOT OF EXPLAINING TO DO)
PEN
NAH
OOPS
CAT BOOK
ELMO BALL
HI FISHIES

SHE KNOWS HER PRIMARY COLORS, SHAPES AND MOST OF THE ALPHABET, AND EVERY ANIMAL SOUND I COULD MAKE:)) SHE OCCASSIONALLY BARKS AND NOW HAS LEARNED TO HOWL LIKE THE DOG. SHE TWEETS LIKE A BIRD AND QUACKS FOR THE DUCKS. I THINK THIS TIME IS JUST AMAZING AS I HEAR HER MAKING NOT JUST WORDS, BUT SENTENCES! WHAT A LONG WAY SHE HAS COME, FROM NOT BEING ABLE TO SAY ANY WORDS BUT MAMA (WHICH MEANT FOOD) BEFORE THE PALATE REPAIR LAST YEAR, TO NOW REPEATING BACK ALMOST EVERY WORD SHE HEARS. SHE HAS THE SWEETEST VOICE AND I SO LOVE TO WATCH HER PLAY AND "ACT" WITH HER LITTLE STUFFED ANIMAL FRIENDS.

YES, EVERYONE HAS TOLD ME SHE WILL SPEAK AND IT HAS BEEN AN OVERNIGHT OCCURENCE. SO FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO STILL HAVE BABIES, EMBRACE THEIR BABBLING! I KNOW IT WON'T BE LONG BEFORE MY DAUGHTER WILL LEAVE HER JARGON AND BABBLING BEHIND HER, AND IN SOME WAYS I'LL MISS IT. HOWEVER, IT'S ANOTHER MILESTONE SHE HAS ACHIEVED!

NOW IF ONLY I COULD STOP BABBLING!

A skip, hop and dance for Daddy

2009-04-15T16:14:00.000-07:00

SMILING SWEETIE

JUST ONE MINUTE HERE! (HER EXPRESSIONS JUST MAKE ME LAUGH)

ME AND MY BEE

AS YOU CAN TELL KIRA'S VERY EXCITED TO SEE HER DADDY!

DADDY'S HOME!

OKAY, I HAVE TO ADMIT THAT I WASN'T QUITE IN THE MOOD TO EDIT ALL THE PHOTOS, SO MOST OR SOOC. I JUST HAD TO POST THEM BECAUSE SHE LOOKED SO STINKIN CUTE AND I JUST LOVE HER SOOOOOOOOO MUCH!

My Spring Flower

2009-03-28T14:25:00.000-07:00

SHE GENTLY TIPTOES OVER THE MELTING MORNING DEW, COVERING THE SEEDLINGS. CAREFUL AND GRACEFUL ARE EACH STEP, AS THE SUN CASTS A SWEET GLOW ON HER FACE.

WITH MY CAT IN ONE HAND AND A FLOWER FOR YOU, SHE LOOKS AT ME AND SOFTLY SAYS, "MOMMA", I LOVE YOU!

WELL, NOT REALLY, BECAUSE SHE'S ONLY TWO, BUT I HEAR THOSE WORDS IN MY HEART EVERY TIME I HOLD YOU.

MY SWEET CHILD, YOU ARE SO PRECIOUS IN EVERY WAY;

YOUR SWEET SMILE, GENTLE HUGS AND PERSONALITY

ARE ATTRIBUTES I LOOK FORWARD TO EVERY DAY!

YES PRETTY CHILD, SO MANY ADORE AND LOVE YOU! IT IS A GIFT TO BEHOLD THE LOVE YOU SHARE WITH OTHERS.

YOU STAND STEADFAST AND DETERMINED TO LEARN THIS BIG WORLD AROUND YOU.

AND YOU ARE, BABY DOLL, YOU ARE!

THE DOORS TO WISDOM, TRUTH AND HUMILITY, ARE ALWAYS OPEN, IT'S THE PATHS WE TAKE THAT LEAD US TO WHERE WE WILL BE.

SO IF YOU'RE EVER AT A CROSS ROAD, AND WONDER WHICH WAY TO GO, REACH INSIDE YOUR HEART, AND REMEMBER MY WORDS...AND BABY, YOU WILL KNOW!

Okay, I know stop rhyming already! I was just going to post these pictures and suddenly got an urge to write, Yikes, when I read it, I feel like I just wrote some lyrics to a bad country love song (no offense to country music, it's one of my fav's).

However, I don't get the chance to express my feelings for this child these days, since she keeps me on my toes, so I thought I just let the photos inspire me.

And she does inspire me!

Lady Peep Boutique

2009-03-23T04:59:00.000-07:00

I've had quite a few comments on the dresses in some of the photos that Kira's wearing. The green flowered dress was made by my sweet friend Daleea who designs her own clothes for children.

I love her dresses, professionally serged, seamed and made with love. So please take a look and visit her at Lady Peep Boutique.

Will post more photos of her dresses.

A play on words

2009-03-20T20:07:00.000-07:00

Having spent the majority of my spare time trying desparetly to learn post-processing editing techniques, I realized that this week has flown by and my little darling was trying to tell me a few things!

For example, the other day she was trying to say "BUTTERFLY", instead it came out as 'BUTTFLY"! Now, was she trying to tell me something here. Afterall she is the center of my world and should be the center of attention around here, right! So I just laughed at her newly acquired word and gently tried to correct her, but she kept looking at me and saying "BUTTFLY".

So today, I took much needed time away from the computer, books, editing, and realized that my tiny peanut is starting to really talk, repeating words, intently listening to sounds and words around her. Okay so they don't come out exactly as they should, but it's so cute to hear her uttering words and talking to Elmo saying, "no", un huh", shhh, the same things she hears me saying! So maybe I have been a BUTTFLY this week, and I so apologize sweet baby if I seemed distracted, however, I have captured some great photos of you, which I hope to scrapbook as I continue on this new venture of learning to take better photos.

It is with joy and pleasure that I look into those big brown eyes and say how much I love you Kira. My hope is that these photos will capture the essence of your childhood, of who you are and the happiness you bring into my life, every minute of every day!

Nice day to play and jump

2009-03-18T05:59:00.000-07:00

WASN'T THE BEST PHOTO BECAUSE THE HAT GOT IN THE WAY OF HER EYES, HOWEVER, I DON'T KNOW HOW TO PHOTOSHOP IT OUT AND JUST CREATED MY OWN PRESET. ALSO DEBATED IF I SHOULD POST IT.
NOTICE BOTH FEET ARE OFF THE GROUND!

YES I LOVE MATILDA JANE, BUT SO DOES MY DAUGHTER NOW AND SINCE SHE'S SO PETITE, EVERYTHING IS BIG, BUT WE MANAGE BY ROLLING HERE, TUCKING THERE! I WASN'T GOING TO PUT THE SCARF ON BUT SINCE IT HAS POM POMS (OR BALLS) LIKE KIRA SAY'S SHE HAD TO WEAR IT.

A FEW FUN SHOTS FROM YESTERDAY, NOW I REALIZE THAT I NEED THIS 50MM LENS, BADLY! I WOULD GET BETTER BOKEH AND CLEARER PHOTOS.

CRITIQUES WELCOME (on photos only)!

Dresses and my Big Dog

2009-03-17T13:24:00.000-07:00

KIRA JUST LOVES FLOWERS, ANYTHING WITH FLOWERS ON THEM AND REAL FLOWERS, JUST LIKE HER MOMMA!

I just laughed when I saw this photo because I told her to hold her dress up and pose pretty for me and she did (with the flower stuck to her nose).

I LOVE THIS PHOTO, SHE'S SEEMS SUCH A BIG GIRL, YET STILL A BABY.
ANOTHER SWEET PHOTO MOMENT.

Okay, so now that I am not too frustrated teaching myself Lightroom, I have managed to create some okay photos. I don't think I could ever shoot a bad photo of Kira, however, she's taking to the camera now and seems to enjoy posing!

By the way, this dress was made for Kira by my dear friend Daleea. Thank you Daleea for the taking the time to make "another Peep" dress. Can't you tell how much Kira loves them? I love these Frocks and they're so versatile. The baby loves to twirl in them and obviously I had a few made in flower prints for her. She didn't want to take this off today, but I traded her something else to wear so we could go and take her dog for a walk. Funny baby.

HERE WOOF WOOF SMELL THIS!

NO THANKS, I'M JUST SITTING IN FOR THE PICTURE KID.

What was so funny is that the dog saw me taking photos and he didn't like being left out so moved his way on the same step, sat there and wanted in. SMART DOGGIE!

I'M TELLING YA WOOF WOOF, IT SMELLS GOOD (as she shoves it in his face)

Funny baby, funny dog!

Flashback Friday

2009-03-13T07:57:00.000-07:00

I HAVE TO ADMIT THAT I GOT THE IDEA TO PUT KIRA IN HER TUTU FROM MY FRIEND KATE, WHO TOOK A GREAT PHOTO OF HER BEAUTIFUL DAUGHTER THIS WEEK IN A HOT PINK PETTISKIRT! GREAT SHOT KATE!

ANYWAY, SINCE KIRA REALLY LIKES TO DRESS UP I THOUGHT, HMMM SHE MIGHT POSE FOR ME...AND HOW RIGHT I WAS! SHE WAS RUNNING AND TWIRLING AND THOUGHT THIS SKIRT WAS SOMETHING ELSE, and it SURE WAS BECAUSE SHE WAS WEARING IT! YES, I know this great photo is blurred and the camera was even on auto. I think the blurring adds dimension and motion. So I did one on black and white for Shutterbug.

I had purchased this tiny skirt before we adopted her and last January found the photo of her in it when we first brought Kira home. She didn't look to pleased with that stiff material around her then. Now, she loves it.

I'M ONLY GONNA DANCE WITH MY BOY ELMO!

CHECK OUT THE TOES!

I THINK SHE'S DOING FIFTH POSITION HERE, OR TRYING TO!

ALWAYS ON THE RUN

CUTIE PATOOTIE!

BABY JUST TURNED ONE WHEN THIS PHOTO WAS TAKEN.

What has Kira is up to these days

2009-03-06T21:25:00.001-08:00

So for the past few weeks, I admit I have been totally obsessed with trying to learn my camera equipment. However, my little daughter seems to know that I am spending way too much time with equipment and not enough time with her! So, the last few times I attempted to get onto the computer, she climbs onto my lap, takes my face in her hands and plants a kiss on my face! It is truly sweet, and remarkably smart. However, when I don't heed her need for immediate attention, things start flying around, like my eye glasses (at least it's not the camera, yet)! So I am trying to blog at least weekly.

This month Kira acquisition and "appropriate" use of word sets has just taken off. Now here's a bit of what she is saying very clearly.

Mom instead of Maaaaa

Addy for Daddy

Elmo

Butterfly (yes I know, it's three syllables, but she likes saying it)

Ba Ba Ba bird (tropical bird, from the baby einstein DVD)

Lion

Atik (meaning cat)

woof woof (referring to her dog)

mwah (more)

moo (milk) LOL

potty

purple

een (green)

bye bye

baby

There are so many others I can't recall currently.

Favorite Activities:

Run

Jump

Climb

Swing

Walk the dog (with me of course)

Dance

Babble (love that)

Learn new words

Play outside

Read

Music

Favorite Foods:

Veggies

Cheese

French Fries (baked sweet potatoe fries)

juice

soy milk

blueberries

yogurt

cereal

my favorite carrot raisin muffins

Favorite Toys:

Play Kitchen

Elmo

Crayon and books

She's such an endearing child. I love to watch her play, mostly I just LOVE HER!

I used to be able to count her words on one hand and now I can't keep track, good job baby girl!

She loves to dress up in her princess outfits that Natalie sent her, it's a riot to see her with those shoes on. She also has started a lot of pretend play with her new kitchen set.

She knows her colors, shapes and can point out some alphabets. And, finally likes me to read to her. She colors outside the lines, runs instead of walks, babbles away.

Black and White

2009-03-03T10:35:00.000-08:00

This month's them at We Picture {this} is photos in Black and white. I actually love BW photos but couldn't think of just one, so let me know which are your favorites here!

Now that I am finally having more fun with black and white I just had to add a few of my absolute favorite photos!

Everything is better in Raw, format that is!

2009-02-27T07:21:00.000-08:00

So this time I purposely engaged RAW as my option of image to shoot in and what a difference! When I cropped the photos, the photos seemed so clear and other than the cropping tool I hardly edited them. Actually I am trying to use the philosophy of Bryan Peterson who says, "...if you take a good photo than you don't need to photoshop it". I like his approach, mostly because I still can't figure out photoshop and I'm so frustrated with that program, I'd like to never use it if I can help it.

I LOVE THIS PHOTO, EVERY DETAIL OF IT. HER HANDS WERE MOVING SO THERE'S A BIT OF BLURRING. CLICK ON IT TO ENLARGE AND YOU CAN SEE EVERY FINE DETAIL DOWN TO HER TINY EYELASHES.

MAA (AS I AM AFFECTIONATELY KNOWN BY) CAN I HAVE PEARL EARRINGS TOO?

TOO CUTE MY DARLING BABY!

SHE WAS TRYING TO HIDE FROM ME AS I CHASED HER AROUND THE HOUSE WITH MY CAMERA! THOUGHT THIS ONE CAME OUT PRETTY GOOD TOO.

Well, I am pleased with my new camera and have slowly realized that I must be patient with learning all the menus and such. But for now, I have reached a milestone in my photo capabilites by just using manual modes and RAW. I would recommend for those of you who also love photos and have this setting in your camera to use it. Though it requires a lot of memory on your card and hard drive, it's worth it. I plan on getting a separate hard drive for the computer anyway. As for the memory cards, well you can always delete the photos and keep shooting.

Woof Woof

2009-02-25T05:18:00.000-08:00

DON'T YA FEEL LIKE DOING THIS TO SOMEONE EVERY NOW AND THEN!

PRETTY WEEDS

SHE RUNS, HE FOLLOWS!
WOOF WOOF, LOOK WHAT I HAVE FOR YOU (NOW I DIDN'T KNOW IF SHE WAS GOING TO THROW IT OR KNOCK HIM ON THE HEAD WITH THIS), SHE THREW IT!

I AM SO ENJOYING KIRA'S NEW FOUND ABILITY TO SPEAK TODDLERESQUE STYLE! THIS WEEK SHE SEEMS TO HAVE TAKEN OFF IN HER WORD ACQUISITION. I AM AMAZED AND THRILLED, SINCE NEXT MONTH WE HAVE ANOTHER SPEECH EVALUATION AND I AM HOPING THEY TELL ME SHE DOESN'T NEED IT.

THE SPEECH ISSUE HAS BEEN A GREAT SOURCE OF FRUSTRATION FOR KIRA AND SINCE SHE STARTED COMMUNICATING WITH BASIC SIGN LANGUAGE AND GESTURES, PULLING HER HAIR AND MINE HAS STOPPED AS WELL AS THE THE H. LECTOR BEHAVIOR:))

SINCE SHE CAN'T PRONOUNCE HER DOG'S NAME (RECCHI) SHE BARKS, WOOF WOOF, IT'S SO FUNNY TO HEAR. WHEN WE TURN INTO THE DEVELOPMENT, I HEAR WOOF WOOF AS THIS IS HER WAY OF TELLING ME "WE'RE HOME". WOOF WOOF IS HER BEST FRIEND THESE DAYS TOO, ALTHOUGH SOMETIMES I WONDER, WHEN I SEE HER SMACKING HIM.

EVERYDAY THIS CHILD AMUSES ME WITH HER ADVENTURES! IT'S SUCH A GIFT TO BE HER MOMMA!

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, SWEET KIRA!

Day at the Aquarium

2009-02-24T14:05:00.000-08:00

What a fun time we all had. Last week we met up with Jennifer and her darling sweeties, Jade and Hayley for a visit to the Aquarium. It is always a good time watching Kira run around and play with her friends!

SINCE I AM A CONFESSED BLOG SLACKER, I AM JUST CATCHING UP ON SOME POSTS AND OTHERS I'VE BEEN WANTING TO VISIT.

Check out this incredible donation for Starfish

2009-02-22T09:20:00.000-08:00

Thank you Sunnie for sending me all these warm and cozy blankets for the Starfish home. I am so excited that I contacted you!

To date my sweet cousin from NY made a substantial financial donation, my niece is working on a school fundraiser for Amanda, and I have a room full of needed items, including No No arm restraints for the surgery and post op and candy for Amanda! How could I not send her something sweet!

A few more ladies are making some blankets too. I can't wait to get everything so I can send them out. If anyone still would like to donate items, email me and I'll give you the address.

Slow Learning Curve

2009-02-22T09:05:00.000-08:00

Okay so I think I finally am on top of the Continental Divide here with my slow learning curve regarding the function settings on my new Nikon! It's almost like I feel I just earned some degree in math or similar. Thank goodness for these books for "Dummies". It took me step by step through each button, menu and anything else I needed to learn. I'm very happy because now I can at least press buttons and know what I am doing, or not accidently press a button and not know how to return to regular shooting.

Yes it's still intimidating in some ways, there are 5 Menus and within those menus, 143 subfolders, and within those subfolders, hundreds of more settings! Actually, what I did was skip to the back of the book, where all the nitty gritty stuff is located and wow, I was on a roll. Even stayed up late to continue on reading. It was like a novel I couldn't stop reading!

So I now know how to set my ISO, metering modes, ISO, use exposure compensation, bracket not only the exposure, but flash and WB settings. This camera is simply beautiful, and has amazing capabilities from the novice to expert photog. I must admit that I've been shooting in manual for the most part, because that's what I only knew before and now that I found out about the internal bracket system, it will correct my errors! Cool stuff!

Now let's see what I can do with it!

AS FAR AS CREATIVITY GOES, NOW I NEED PHOTOSHOP ELEMENTS FOR DUMMIES!

I did it

2009-02-20T13:15:00.000-08:00

THE RESULT OF MY FIRST PHOTOSHOP EXPERIENCE AND I DIDN'T GET IT RIGHT. I NOW SEE THAT THE COLOR IN HER HAT IS MUCH BRIGHTER AND PINKER THAN THE ORIGINAL COLORS. WELL THERE'S ALWAYS THAT PHOTOSHOP FOR DUMMIES BOOK!

I AM BESIDE MYSELF WITH EXCITEMENT HERE! I KNOW YOU ALL CAN FEEL IT TOO:)) BECAUSE I HAVE GOTTEN PAST THE FIRST CHAPTER OF D90 FOR DUMMIES! IN ADDITION, I LEARNED THIS EDIT TECHNIQUE TODAY IN PART TO MY GOOD FRIEND NATALIE WHO REFERRED ME TO AN ONLINE TUTORIAL. THANKS, I NO LONGER NEED THE IDIOT'S GUIDE TO PSE, JUST THE DUMMY GUIDE, I'M TREKKING ALONG HERE PRETTY GOOD.

OKAY, FIRST I HAVE TO SAY SO MUCH BLOGGING AND SO LITTLE TIME! I HAVE AWARDS TO GIVE OUT AND PEOPLE TO NOTIFY, YET BY THE END OF THE DAY, I'M JUST BEAT! THIS BABE DEMANDS MY ATTENTION EVERY MINUTE LATELY. I HAVE TO SAY I ACTUALLY LOVE IT BECAUSE I THINK ABOUT HOW I WOULD DAYDREAM ABOUT HEARING THE SOUNDS OF LITTLE FOOTSTEPS RUNNING AROUND THE FLOORS OR LITTLE ARMS TUGGING AT MY LEGS AND NOW, THOSE DAYS ARE A BEAUTIFUL REALITY!

I AM CONSUMED WITH LOVE FOR KIRA AND CAN'T HELP BUT ADMIT IT! WHILE SHE DOES THE FUNNIEST THINGS TO ENTERTAIN HERSELF AND ME, SHE'S STARTING TO ALSO TALK, WHICH IS A BIG MILESTONE FOR THIS CHILD. SHE CAN CLEARLY SAY NO, IN THE DAINTY VOICE OF HERS, AND HAS A VOCABULARY OF ABOUT 28 WORDS (VERY GOOD FROM 10 IN SEPTEMBER). SHE KNOWS HER COLORS, SHAPES AND CAN DO CALCULUS WITHOUT A CALCULATOR (JUST MAKING SURE THIS ISN'T A BORING POST LOL). I AM A PROUD MOMMA, KNOWING THAT KIRA'S CLEFT PALATE ISN'T STANDING IN HER WAY OF VERBALLY MAKING HER POINT KNOWN.

SO PLEASE COMMENT ON HOW I CAN IMPROVE MY PHOTOSHOP TECHNIQUES!

A day in the park

2009-02-16T22:48:00.000-08:00

Maa, look what I can do when you're on the computer!

2009-02-16T22:07:00.001-08:00

MAA, I'M GOING TO PRESS THIS HERE BIG RED BUTTON THAT SAYS DON'T PRESS! YEP THE LITTLE BABE DID JUST THAT, SHE FIGURED OUT HOW TO SET OFF AN ALARM THAT WASN'T EVEN ARMED! THE ALARM COMPANY SAID SHE PUNCHED IN THE CORRECT SET OF SEQUENCED NUMBERS TO DO THAT. I TOLD HIM SHE'S ONLY 2, HE SAID WELL THAT'S THE ONLY WAY SHE COULD HAVE SET IT OFF, I TOLD HIM, HE NUTS! SHE'S ONLY 2 AS IN TWO YEARS OLD! BUT NOW IT WAS MY PROBLEM NOT HIS TO DEAL WITH.

NEXT THING I KNOW SIRENS WERE BLASTING, EAR PIERCING SOUNDS WERE COMING FROM PLASTIC THINGIES IN THE CEILING AND THE DOGS HOWLING, THE CATS ON THE CEILING AND I'M HEADING TO THE NUT HOUSE! HOW WAS I GOING TO EXPLAIN ALL THIS TO THE POLICE (I WAS THINKING THEY WERE ABOUT TO SHOW UP ANY MINUTE) THEN I SUDDENLY REMEMBERED, I DON'T HAVE AN ALARM, SO WHAT'S ALL THIS NOISE ABOUT! UGH, THE NOISE WAS DEAFENING AND I COULDN'T THINK OF WHAT TO DO OR WHOM TO CALL. SO I WALKED DOWN INTO THE BASEMENT AND STARTED PULLING BREAKERS, OFF ON/OFF ON, NOTHING! THEN PULLED OUT SOME PLUGS, NOTHING! THEN REALIZED I WAS GOING TO HAVE TO LEAVE THE HOUSE BECAUSE I COULDN'T STAND THE NOISE, WHEN SUDDENLY I REALIZED, HEY I'M A NURSE, I'VE HAD SOME EXPERIENCE IN ELECTRICITY, SO LET ME PUT MY THINKING CAP ON.

OKAY DOES ANYONE RECOGNIZE ANYTHING FAMILIAR IN THE FOLLOWING PHOTOS?

WELL GOOD, NEITHER DID I, BUT I HAD TO DO SOMETHING!

SO I WENT TO THE BASEMENT AND FOUND THIS CIRCUIT BOARD! AH WHATS A FEW CHIPS HERE AND THERE AND SOME WIRES TO A GAL, RIGHT?
SAME POWER CIRCUIT BOARD NOW RESET AND ARMED (OOOH SOUNDS DANGEROUS)
THIS WAS BEFORE RESET AND I JUST PULLED AT THE WIRES. I THOUGHT ONE OF THEM HAS TO SHUT THE THING UP! I DON'T THINK ANY BOMB SQUADES WOULD HIRE ME AFTER THIS MESS:))
I FOUND A BATTERY, THAT DIDN'T LOOK LIKE ANY BATTERY I WAS USED TO SEEING AND PULLED THE ELECTRODES. ACTUALLY I TUGGED AND RIPPED THEM OFF, AND THE NOISE STOPPED. AWH PEACE AND QUIET! FINALLY, BUT THEN MY EARS STARTED TO RING, HONESTLY I WAS LOOSING IT, KIND OF LIKE BEING RIGHT UP TO A HUGE METAL ROCK BAND WITH YOUR EAR PLASTERED TO THE SPEAKER. THEN YOU WALK OUT AND CAN'T HEAR A THING, THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED

TO ME...SO MORAL OF THE STORY, WHEN BABY WANTS TO PLAY WITH YOU, PLAY!

OR ALARMS WILL START BUZZING AND SQUEALING AND YOU'D WISH YOU WOULD HAVE JUST PUT IN THAT DVD ELMO TAPE FOR THE 100TH TIME!

OH SO GLAD MY BROTHER IS AN ELECTRICIAN, HE KNEW WHAT TO DO AND PUT ALL THOSE WIRES BACK IN PLACE! THANK YOU SO MUCH BABY BROTHER, YOU'RE THE BEST!

The way I see it

2009-02-16T21:41:00.001-08:00

I just had to have a Starbucks! My one vice is coffee and soy lattes a must. I was so addicted to them on a daily basis when I worked, one would think it was a food group I created, because I skipped lunch to walk across the street and get my venti sugar free vanilla soy latte. I can proudly admit to now being an ex=latteholic who can now enjoy this drink once a month or two. Yep, there's no Starbucks near my home and since I will also confess to being a coffee snob, well, I'll just make my own!

Anyway, while daydreaming in the car, I looked at the side of the cup and this is what it said:

There is a subtle difference between a mission and a promise.

A mission is something you strive to accomplish

A promise is something you are compelled to keep.

One is individual, the other is shared. When a mission and a promise are one and the same, that's when mountains are moved and races won".

~Hala Moddelmog

President and Ceo

Susan G. Komen for the Cure

How beautiful and fitting I thought. Sometimes when you want to do something you feel as if your a small fish in this big sea. I guess reading this over and over I realized, hey I can help the babies at Starfish, I can help Amanda and I will help Jailynn. The auction for Jailynn has been going very well and the second round is about to start this week. Many amazing people have donated their time and talents to providing me with the most adorable clothes. Some are also making blankets for the Starfish Home. I sent out about 30 emails or more and only really expected a small return, yet instead got a dozen or so interested sellers from etsy.com that were more than happy to participate. I am so grateful to them all, so talented and giving.

So please check out Jailynn's Prayer and see for yourself! Even if you leave a comment of inspiration, it will be something that Melanie (Mommy to Jailynn) can read. As a follow up the Kerr Family has received their TA, but are still struggling to get the monies needed. We'll do what we can and I know that little girl will be home before she knows it.

Thanks everyone! Enjoy the new designer items on the blog.

Shutterbug

2009-02-14T10:13:00.000-08:00

I decided it was time to have another blog. Click here to see it. Keep in mind it's a work in progress, sort of like me:))

Comments, suggestions, critiques needed.

Ivy

Photo Preparedness and everything else I happened upon

2009-02-09T13:30:00.000-08:00

OH MY GOODNESS! ACTUALLY, THAT'S NOT EVEN CLOSE TO THE EXPLICATIVE I WOULD USE TO DESCRIBE THE PHOTOS OF Deb and Lisa! While they are two naturally, gifted photographers, Lisa recently took the photo course that Jen, Kate and I are going to attend at the end of April. We are all so excited and can't wait.

In the meantime, in order to prepare for this course, I am trying to learn as much about this habit of mine as possible. So yes, there is a book called the Nikon D90 for Dummies and Yes I ordered it! While the title may sound cute, don't let it fool you, because the inside is like reading an encyclopedia in pig Latin. I just want to get to know my camera a bit better. It's very technical with a slow learning curve (at least for me). But hey yesterday I was SHOOTING IN RAW AND DIDN'T EVEN KNOW IT, that is until I looked at the huge files it created:))

Now, I say to myself, what button did I accidentally push to get RAW. It's not like there is this huge RED BUTTON THAT STICKS OUT AND SAYS "HEY PUSH THIS FOR RAW FORMAT". No, it's just not that easy to "accidentally" get into this format because to get back to jpeg normal format, you press at least one button, scroll down into the menu, then over to your selection, and then press OK. I couldn't have done that by accident (which my husband insists I did). It must have defaulted or something! Ha, that's funny, I'm blaming the camera!

Okay, so I now anxiously await my new reading material, which by the way doesn't include Photoshop for Dummies. I need the Idiot's guide on PSE and I know it's around somewhere!

Leave a comment if you know where I can buy it!

This was about as close as I could come to the Idiot's guide to Photoshop Essentials. I mean I need something quick and easy here. Nothing too detailed (even if the program is).
Then I found this book. Yes I am onto something now. We will use this program a lot from what I hear.

And there is a PSE 6 for Dummies...go figure! I just learned how to master Mac and iPhoto.

Then I found this and thought, where was this book when I needed it!

Then I stumbled upon these...non-fiction or fiction?

OH MY? YOU DRILL WHERE?

Virtually a book for every field, complaint, political agenda, current affairs, history, and so on.

While I found the necessary reading material, I am hoping that in the next few weeks I can actually learn a thing or two on my own. I intend to sneak over to Borders for coffee and an armful of books to bury my head in as well. Yes I am determined to learn what I can and make the most out of this amazing technical device that with the click of a button will preserve a priceless moment in time!

DIM SUM ANYONE? photos finally

2009-02-09T12:25:00.000-08:00

Yesterday we met up with friends from the Bucks County FCC group! We went to the Imperial Inn for Dim Sum in Phila. The food was great, as usual. It's been so long since I had really, really good Chinese food and this was perfect!

It was wonderful to see all the girls dressed up in their traditional Chinese outfits. They were soooooooooo adorable and I could tell they were having fun with sweet sounds of laughter and chatting! I am surprised we didn't get thrown out of there since the tiny Hunan princess ran around to each table and then around the entire restaurant till she was almost in the kitchen. It was beautiful outside with the temperature in the 50's here.

Afterwards, we decided to not stay for the parade due to the loud firecrackers they set off. Kira was already freaked by Sponge Bob the night before, so I thought it best to wait till she's older to understand about the meaning of the Dragon Parade.

I made sure I got my "red envelopes" with the Year of the Ox on them and a then a sheet of the Lunar New Year postage stamps 2009 as little momentos for Kira's scrapbook. I have been saving the stamps during the wait for our referral and it's become a little tradition of mine since.

Then we were off to my brothers' house so I could help my niece study for her nursing exams. Poor thing, she was yawning the entire time:)), maybe it was my big mouth again, or she was just plain tired. Anyway, I do hope she remembers some of the stuff. There's just so much to learn, I wonder how I did it back then. Then again, I remember...there was someone who helped me when I needed it. How strange that this time of year I get nostalgic for the past. I don't know why, but it happens. Fortunately they are very good memories that I'll hold dear to me. I think a lot has to do with the fact that my brother lives where we all grew up as young children. So I drive past my old house, high school, roads and byways I used to walk, places I used to play and homes of friends I adored. Guess this should be a separate post, but hey this is my blog, I can write what I want! Plus I have a few minutes to myself for a change!

Anyway, Dim Sum was great, meeting my new friends always makes me smile and happy and, yes, taking a walk down memory lane, 20 plus something years of it, also warms my heart, in a big way!

I'LL HAVE ONE OF EVERYTHING PLEASE!
OH THIS IS SUCH A GREAT PHOTO!
KIRA MAKING MIA LAUGH!

I JUST LOVE THE FACES OF THESE LITTLE GIRLS, SO LOVED AND SO BEAUTIFUL. WHAT I ENJOY IS WATCHING THE INTERACTION OF THE GIRLS WITH THEIR PARENTS. THE AFTERNOON SHOULD HAVE BEEN "GIRL FUN" VERSUS DIM SUM...HERE ARE SOME SWEETIES THAT DIDN'T MIND HAVING A PIC TAKEN, JUST LOOK AT THE SMILES!

HERE IS THE POSTAGE STAMP FOR THE LUNAR NEW YEAR 2009 PRETTY STAMP

FOR THE CHILDREN at STARFISH

2009-02-07T10:27:00.000-08:00

My dear friend Daleea is doing what she does best, selflessly helping others! She emailed me to advice me of the second annual fundraiser for the Starfish Home in China, inquiring if I could pass on information regarding important needs.

If you click on the the Starfish blog you'll see why I couldn't pass up this opportunity to help. There are so many beautiful babies waiting to have surgeries, that's the problem, they are waiting! Waiting for sponsors and money to have the necessary surgeries that will probably save their lives.

Amanda de Lange, is a teacher from South Africa who somehow found it in her way to Asia to work with children. She is working with provincial orphanage officials, taking in babies that are in the most desparate need of medical attention. There they are placed on a strict nutritional program to prepare them for upcoming surgery. Amanda does the scheduling for surgery and also pays for it. Even more astonishing is that she accompanies each baby to the provincial hospital, often staying by his/her side till recovered and able to travel back to Xi'an.

Currently she has 30 children of which there are nine babies from 10 days old to 11 months who are in her direct care in Xi'an, China. This is a list of items that has been requested:

Vicks 5
Tylenol 10
Motrin 17
Sunscreen 2
Oatmeal 20
Craisins 12
Teething Tablets 4
Onesies 21 (there are more than this because I counted packages as one)
Shoes 35
Boots 3
Pants 3
Coats 17
Shorts 18
Sleepers 106
Girls Outfits 88
Sheet 1
Bottles 6
Boys Outfits 48
Sweaters 15
Gloves 3
Booties 6
Socks 35 (there are more because I counted packages as one)
Sun Hats 9
Bibs 17 (there are more because I counted packages as one)
Baby Hats 19
Hats 3
Shirts 58
T-Shirts 22
Sweats 16
She does need: infant liquid vitamins and teething tablets, along with the infant tylenol and motrin

If you want to send any of the above items, please email me and I'll give you the address.

HERE'S AN EXCERPT FROM AMANDA'S BLOG

"with 30 little mouths to feed.Starfish Foster HomeXian ChinaAt Starfish, we have taken care of 67children to date, arranged almost 50 surgeries and had a whopping 18 international adoptions, so our little alumni live all over the globe: the US (latest adoptions to Kentucky and New Jersey), Netherlands, Norway and Spain. Two children are matched at the moment waiting for their families. We currently have 30 babies under the age of 3 1/2 at the foster home".

So let's all pass the word around and try to get these babies their surgeries!

Thank you all for taking the time to read this and reaching out to help.